Weird News Wednesday-Say What?

N.M. orders 500 talking urinal cakes

By TIM KORTE, Associated Press Writer

RIO RANCHO, N.M. - New Mexico is hoping to keep drunks off the road by lecturing them at the last place they usually stop before getting behind the wheel: the urinal. The state recently paid $21 each for about 500 talking urinal-deodorizer cakes and has put them in men's rooms in bars and restaurants across the state.

When a man steps up, the motion-sensitive plastic device says, in a woman's voice that is flirty, then stern: "Hey, big guy. Having a few drinks? Think you had one too many? Then it's time to call a cab or call a sober friend for a ride home." The recorded message ends: "Remember, your future is in your hand."
Ok, first of all when a drunk guy hears a woman's flirtatious voice in the men's room I am thinking he's gonna whip around without thinking and then you've got a fun mess to clean up. However, I do think there is a touch of brilliance in addressing him as 'big guy' and telling him his future is in his hand while he is at the urinal. Then again, now the sot is all pumped up and does what...asks the urinal for her number maybe?

The talking urinal represents just the latest effort to fight drunken driving in New Mexico, which has long had one of the highest rates of alcohol-related traffic deaths in the nation. (The new tactic is aimed only at men, since they account for 78 percent of all driving-under-the-influence-related convictions in New Mexico.)
Well, that and there aren't a lot of women using urinals quite honestly...and I shudder to think of talking toilet seats in the ladies' room. Here's some wasted chick trying desperately to maintain the hover position and the seat talks to her while her pantyhose are down around her ankles. Lord have mercy...

"It startled me the first time I heard it, but it sure got my attention," said Ben Miller, a patron at the Turtle Mountain Brewing Co. bar and restaurant. "It's a fantastic idea." Jim Swatek, who was drinking a beer nearby, said: "You think, `Maybe I should call the wife to come get me.'"
Talking porcelain would, at the very least, make me wonder if I'd had one too many...

Turtle Mountain Brewing owner Niko Ortiz commended the New Mexico Transportation Department for "thinking way outside the box." Department spokesman S.U. Mahesh said the bathroom is a perfect place to get the message across. In the restroom, "guys don't chitchat with other guys," he said. "It's all business. We've got their total attention for 10 to 15 seconds."
George Michael notwithstanding...


Similar urinal cakes have been used for anti-drug campaigns in Colorado, Pennsylvania and Australia, and for anti-DWI efforts on New York's Long Island, said Richard Deutsch of New York-based Healthquest Technologies Inc., which manufactures the devices. But Deutsch said he believes New Mexico is the only state to buy the devices.
Evidence of New Mexicans having a sense of humor or more government waste?

At the Turtle Mountain, the urinal cakes have proved so intriguing that three have been swiped already. "I'm mystified why someone would stick their hand into one of our urinals," Ortiz said. "But I'm sure we'll see them on eBay. Hopefully, the seller will advertise it as, `Stolen from Turtle Mountain.'"
You're mystified?? Really? We are talking about drunk people here, right? Nothing should mystify you.

Trini Tuesday-Find the Foreigner

In stead of 'Where's Waldo?' we have a game of 'find the foreigner.' It's not exactly the picture I wanted but I couldn't find the one I was looking for. Do you see her in the lower left corner with the red hair? Put her outside in the bright tropical sunshine and she looks like her head is on fire. You can't miss her.

Given that Diana was prone to wandering away if we didn't have a tight grip on her hand it was pretty convenient that she stuck out from a crowd so easily. Being a red head in a sea of dark faces with dark hair does have that as an advantage. There were times when it drove her a bit crazy. When she was even younger than in this picture and a crowd of children would close in around her determined to explore her bright hair and pale skin with a hundred inquisitive fingers she understandably found that a bit too much.

When Mr. Lime and I wanted to celebrate our anniversary by having dinner in town our dear friends offered to watch Diana for the night. We came back some hours later and asked if everything went well. My friend Flora said yes but she would never take Diana on another walk in the village again. I was concerned that perhaps Diana, who has ALWAYS had a mind of her own, had acted up defiantly and caused a problem. Flora assured me Diana had behaved well but the problem was that every 3 steps some other child was coming up wanting to touch Diana's hair and skin, wanting to know 'Whu happen to she color? She bathe and it come off she?'

Of course there were other issues that came with being a redhead in the tropics. I had to be extremely careful so she didn't get a sunburn. She lived in prairie bonnets and I sort of wished I had a vat I could fill with sunblock and dip her in every morning. It would have been easier than the constant smearing. Around the house she rarely wore more than a diaper but if we went out for the day I covered as much of her skin as I could. At night I'd let her go with as few clothes as possible. Of course every Trini grandmother was sure I was going to kill this child because I had it all backwards. During the day it was, 'Look how de chile will stifle in de heat with so much clothes and a hat!' At night it was, 'But look, de chile naked in de dew. She would catch her death!' To a Trini grandmother there are few things worse a mother can do than allow her baby to go without a knit hat outside at night...bareheaded 'in the dew' (night air) you will catch the virus and die!'

I am happy to report that in spite of my risky parenting style Diana has safely made it to age 16. Long live the redhead!

A Moose Whispered...

I'm feeling particualrly uninpsired today so I swiped this from Moose. the rules are that you answer each question in 3 words, no more, no less. That's about the speed my brain is at today so...

1. Where is your cell phone? On my desk

2. Boyfriend/girlfriend?haven't got one

3. Hair? wild curly mop

4. Your mother? always learning something

5. Your father? always challenge authority

6. Your favorite item(s)? some sentimental stuff

7. Your dream last night? I had none

8. Your favorite drink? cold lemon water

9. Your dream guy/girl? does not exist

10. The room you are in? needs a cleaning

11. Your fear? loss of beloveds

12. What do you want to be in 10 years? healthy, loved, wiser

13. Who did you hang out with last night? my whole family

14. What are you not? skinny, rich, famous

15. Are you in love? define 'in love'

16. One of your wish list items? cure for cancer

17. What time is it? Howdy Doody time!

18. The last thing you did? checked my email

19. What are you wearing? jammies needing washed

20. Your favorite book? 'The Little Prince'

21. The last thing you ate? tomato basil soup

22. Your life? wee bit odd

23. Your mood? not very happy

24. Your friends? inspiring, loyal, kind

25. What are you thinking about right now? rather not say

26. Your car? dirty old minivan

27. What are you doing at this moment? answering this meme

28. Your summer? too far away

29. Your relationship status? I have one

30. What is on your TV screen? lots of dust

31. When is the last time you laughed? when son joked

32. Last time you cried? 5 minutes ago

33. School? snow day today

Friday 55 & Da Count-Creativity

Gently, carefully his skilled hands caressed her lovely form smoothing away time's ravages, restoring her youthful glow. He worked deliberately to honor her as he marvelled over her beauty, silently praised her maker. He whispered to her as he moved down her spine and thought he heard, 'A little lower and to the left, darling...'

RESTORATION.... A restorer of the Foundation of Prussian Castles and Gardens Berlin-Brandenburg cleans a marble sculpture from Sanssouci Castle's Orangerie in Potsdam, Germany. The castle's statues are traditionally cleaned and restored during the winter months. Photo courtesy: AFP.

I just LOVED this picture when I found it. It's been sitting in drafts for a while waiting for me to use it. It's been a while since I did a Friday 55 and it's not that I lack things to count but I was feeling somewhat uninspired in both areas. Then I went to read Lecram's count today and I knew it was time to use this. Now, I am no writer, artist or musician (yes, I like to blog and toss out the occasional poem or story, I can draw reasonable facsimiles of things I want to represent, I play guitar really badly and sing worse...it's all more or less to amuse myself, not because I have any delusions of giftedness) but I am so very grateful for the folks who have genuine gifts in these areas and bless the rest of us with them.

At the same time, I love to see what is produced as someone learns and develops skills in these areas. I have huge files of kid art (including at least a ream of dinosaurs, foxes, and heroes as Isaac went through his various early elementary artistic periods. He's now exiting the medieval warrior period and entering the football uniform design phase, hahaha. Just draw kiddo, anything you want. Don't stop.) I have more files of their stories and journals from when they started learning to write. Again, Isaac has produced some pretty hilarious stuff (a boy superhero who drives a nuclear powered Ford, some cute poetry inspired by Jack Prelutsky and Shel Silverstein, the adventures of the very stupid teacher....inspired by his very dim 3rd grade teacher.)

I'm so thankful for the people who inspire me in creativity and who help me encourage kids in theirs. When Calypso was taking piano lessons and started noodling around with something she had composed instead of her assigned lesson her teacher didn't reprimand her. She pulled out paper and said, 'Let's write that down so others can play it too!' She walked her through adding some more and polishing it up and Calypso performed it at her first recital. Can you just imagine the way that kid was beaming??

So this week I am counting the beauty of creativity. Have a great weekend and either add something creative or enjoy and encourage someone else who has.

HNT-Tie Dye # 5, That's a Wrap

I didn't have a chance to take a picture this week so here's one from a few years ago. My best friend and I went to the east coast Hippie Heaven (aka New Paltz, NY) for a weekend before she got married. I picked up this groovy tie dye skirt, which I still love. We were goofing around in the hotel room. She told me I was being too frumpy because I always wore baggy tunic shirts and I needed to show my goodies a little more. She gave me the tight black shirt and I hiked up the skirt, at which moment she grabbed my camera and took this picture. Aren't you all lucky she captured a tie dyed spirit of HNT so many years ago?

Happy HNT!

Overheard in the Waiting Room

I had a groovy little news item all set to use for today's Weird Wednesday then I went to the doctor's yesterday (periodic check on Janita....crap I didn't want to hear but, whaddaya gonna do?) The doc was running way behind and I had to sit for two hours before they ever took me in. If I had to sit there for two hours and have my whole schedule for the day completely trashed I have to say it was a really entertaining two hours. I do have other suggestions for how to amuse yourself during a long wait in a a doctor's office but I didn't need them today. It was people watching heaven.

In an orthopedist's office there are various people in quite obvious states of disrepair and reassembly. The office was completely filled too. I took the last available seat. In my section there was a teenage boy with a casted hand, a married couple (we shall refer to as George and Gert) where the wife had a c-collar and was clearly lacking use of one hand, a couple of nondescript folks, and a middle-aged single woman (we shall refer to as Tina).

Tina had a very inquisitive nature, very few inhibitions, and a very loud voice. I'm pretty sure her lack of inhibitions were the result of some after effects of an injury she sustained and I am in no way making fun of her. Allow me to relate my favorite snippets of conversation from the 2 hour wait.

Tina: (to teenage boy) What did you do to your hand?

Boy: Broke my thumb.

Tina: How the hell do ya break a thumb? Did it hurt like hell? What a weird thing to break.

Boy: I was skateboarding. Yeah it hurt but not too bad.

Tina: A thumb is a crazy thing to break. I sure never heard of that before.

George: My friend broke both his thumbs at the same time.

Tina: You're putting me on. Both thumbs? How the hell did he wipe his butt if he had two casts?

George: Good question. I never asked.

Tina: That had to hurt like hell and I wanna know how he wiped his butt. (regarding Gert) Is that your wife? What happened to her?

Gert: Yes, I'm his wife. I was in a car accident.

Tina: Did you run a stop sign or something? You're a mess.

Gert: I don't remember what happened. I woke up a month later.

Tina: So you blacked out huh? Yeah, I ran into a wall. I blacked out. I don't remember what happened until I was in the ambulance.

George: Walls are bad to run into.

Tina: Yeah, they had to operate on my spine. That round thing in my spine. What is it?

Gert: A disk?

Tina: Yeah, a disk. Wanna see the scar? (walking to Gert, lifting her shirt, leaning in real close so Gert is sure not to miss)

Gert: That's a beaut.

Tina: You got any like that?

Gert: A few but I'm not showing you.

Tina: My surgeon was brilliant. I mean tops. Not like my OB/GYN who is awful. You know I went for one of those Pap tests. I dunno what the hell he was doing but I thought he was gonna split me wide open.

Me: (Looking up from my book which I have been reading as I discretely eavesdrop...yeah, sue me...I was there for two hours and did I mention Tina was LOUD? It would have been impossible NOT to eavesdrop. I am exchanging glances with George and Gert now as if to say, 'I sure hope she doesn't have any scars down there she wants to display.' Quickly diving back into the pages so I don't snicker when the meaning is tacitly understood)

Tina: You two have kids?

George: Yes, six, plus a couple extras we got along the way.

Tina: Six kids??? Extras? You're kidding? Why extras?

George: Well, in case we loose any of the originals.

Tina: Oh, you're being silly now. (to Gert) Do you really have six kids plus extras?

Gert: Yes we do.

Tina: (Extra loud) Well, I guess we know what you two like to do in your spare time!

George: (Grinning ear to ear)

Gert: (Bowing her head slightly and covering her eyes with her hand)

Boy: (Slaps his good hand over his mouth)

Me: (Desperately trying to stifle guffaws. In so doing I am shaking so hard I am pretty sure the tremors are being recorded on any seismic detectors in the area. Holding book up high to hide my face as tears roll down my cheeks because I know if I let so much as one squeak out I am going to fall out of my chair and split a gut laughing. I foolishly dare to make eye contact with George and Gert once I think I've regained a degree of composure. He is still grinning like the cat that got the bird and she is rolling her eyes.)

Tina: I need a man like that but he's gotta let me alone when I wanna be let alone.

Me: (Devastating aftershocks ensue....I'm dying. You'll be happy to know I remained silent but I think there was a crack in the building foundation as a result of my shaking)

Trini Tuesday-Is Carnival!

Enjoy the sights and sounds. If you don't have time to watch everything now, come back a few times or just play it in the background. I dare you not to want to wine dem hips.

Video from Carnival 2005



More Carnival footage with soundtrack of a medley of artists. this one shows a little bit of everything from J'ouvert (predawn hours of Carnival Monday) to Ash Wednesday. I explained very briefly about the Carnival events last year.



A bit more with the sounds of the street.

I got nuthin here.....

I had up a post that was horrifyingly sad. I thought better about keeping it up because it publicly addressed something that probably is not my business to publicly address. To be more discreet...if you are at all the type to pray, please pray for a family I know that has experienced unimaginable horror this past week...a woman with a 20 year illness that has robbed her of most function, a husband who has tenderly cared for her all those years and yet who came to a breaking point which erupted in unbelieveable violence. Shock waves are rippling through the community. The vultures sit perched ready to descend upon the vicitms. I am brokenhearted for each person in this wretched situation.

Tell me a story about a time when someone surprised you with an act of mercy or kindness when you most needed it.

Da Count-This Makes Me So Very Happy

I was looking for some actual footage of Blood, Sweat and Tears performing You've Made Me So Very Happy because a very dear friend who left this world 2 years ago today enjoyed it so much. I found other songs but not that one. Then I found this guy singing the medley and I knew that my friend, with his love of silliness, would have LOVED seeing a chinese guy with a bad combover and a shiny psychedelic jacket do this song.

His time here was too damned short but I'm counting that it was long enough for us to intersect and for me to have warm and wonderful memories. I'm counting his crazy sense of humor which he never lost. I'm counting his generous and gentle spirit.

I miss you but...I'm so glad you came into my life.

Since we've had a couple of snow days this week, here's another one of his favorites.

HNT-Tie Dye #4 All Wrapped Up

Next in the series we have my tie-dyed bath towel. I got tired of other people stealing my towel because they claimed it looked like theirs. I thought what better way to make it unmistakeably mine but to get a tie-dyed one.

Happy Tie-dyed HNT!

My Funny Valentine

Two of the people in this picture got married. It's a little tough to see but the two weird ones making goofy faces is your first hint. Need another hint? Scroll down....

What a couple of weirdos. A match made in....uh...er....um...a mental ward? Keep in mind these two people have reproduced 3 times. Be afraid...be VERY afraid!

Trini Tuesday-Trini 2 De bone

There are 2 times of year when every expatriate Trini on the planet longs to be home...Christmas and Carnival. Carnival will be next week so I thought I'd share something from my favorite Trini musician, David Rudder. I can't imbed the video but please go here and check him out. And apologies in advance to TTfootball for invoking homesickness. Gyal, I feelin' fuh de sun too...

*image from www.islandevents.com

Soca: Trini To De Bone (2003)
Islands in the sun (2x)
Welcome, welcome one and all to de land of fete
Trini to de bone, trini to de bone
When it come to bacchanal, well, they cyar beat we yet
Trini to de bone, trini to de bone
Sweet women parade abundantly
De brethren dey full ah energy
Some people say God is ah Trini
Paradise and all convincing me God gave us a spirit fiery
Nothing in de world could bother we
Well look ah smart man gone wit' we money
We still come out and mash up de party

Chorus:
(Sweet sweet T&T) Oh how I love up dis country
(Sweet sweet T&T) No place in dis world I'd rather be
(Sweet sweet T&T) Oh how I love up meh country
(Sweet sweet T&T) All dis sugar cyar be good for me
(Oh oh) From Toco to Caroni
(Oh oh) Maravel to Sans Souci
(Oh oh) From Scarborough to Coco Reef
(Oh oh) Profiling on Frederick Street

Chorus

All these years I spent abroad in de cold longing to be home
Trini to de bone, trini to de bone
God I pray that some sweet day I will no longer have to roam
Trini to de bone, trini to de bone
De problems we have are plain to see
We prove we could stand de scrutiny
All and all, a true democracy
How we vote, is not how we party
There's no place like home some people say
Though some have to leave to make their way
But in their hearts I know their destiny
To come home and big up de country

(Sweet sweet T&T) Lord how I love up dis country
(Sweet sweet T&T) No place in dis world I'd rather be
(Sweet sweet T&T) Lord how I love up meh country
(Sweet sweet T&T) All dis sugar cyar be good for me
(Oh oh) From Couva to Signal Hill
(Oh oh) Arima to Charlotteville
(Oh oh) Matelot down to Port Ah Spain
(Oh oh) We playin' mas sun or rain
(Sweet sweet T&T) Oh how I love up dis country
(Sweet sweet T&T) No place in dis world I'd rather be

[bridge]
(Rudder chants) Look ah Trini gyal dey, she breaking away
Tobago gyal, oh what a bacchanal
De men dem wild, de wickedest style
De gyal look back, dey on de attack
De style just change, man re-arrange
De fete gone clear, cause nothing can compare to a Trini rising
Oh no no, (Oh no) nothing can compare to a Trini rising
As crazy as we might seem to be
We still fight to be a family Indian,
African or a Chinee Syrian,
French-Creole and Portuguese

We blessed wit' a spirit fiery
Some people say God is a Trini
Sweet women parade abundantly
Now de problem is plain to see

Chorus
(Oh oh) West Mooring to Los Iros
(Oh oh) From Sando to Mayaro
(Oh oh) From Penal to Grand Riviére
(Oh oh) Sweetness in abundance everywhere

Chorus
No no no no Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah

Sweet T&T Performed by David Rudder & Carl Jacobs

Interesting Observations

We were looking through old photo albums when my son saw this picture of his dad. His comment was, 'He looks like the kid who has his milk money stolen...every...single...day!'

Then we found this picture and I asked if my son knew who it was. He had no idea. When I told him it was Grampop (my dad) he said, "THAT'S Grampop? The guy who drank snake's blood, never combs his hair, never wears a shirt, and scares the crap out of my best friend?'

Then the boy spied a picture of me and said, 'Gees Mom, you look like a real goody-goody. Had em fooled.'

The child forgets we have naked baby pictures of him...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Apologies

Sorry about the concern I caused by being AWOL the last couple of days. Thank you to all the folks who emailed, IMed, or called to make sure I hadn't met some catastrophic fate.

I can assure you I have not fallen from a great height or broken any limbs or met with any other major disaster. There were a number of aggravating things that piled up over the course of the week that got the better of me, various loads of unpleasant smelling manure than needed to be hauled off, and then I had a dear friend come visit and I was just enjoying the break with her. I REALLY appreciated seeing her and enjoying her relative sanity (I mean she's a really close friend of mine so you just know she has to have some serious weirdness going on in some way....I love her to pieces!)

Anyway, I should be back Monday. Thanks for caring.

Have a great weekend.

Smells gooood!

It's not a meme or a tag but Lacquer did a post on all his favorite smells and it sent me tripping down memory lane (makes sense if you know that the olfactory sections of your brain are located most closely to the memory areas). I am shamelessly stealing his idea. I'll start with some of the points of agreement...

Clean Laundry: Especially sheets that have been hung on the wash line. Fresh, clean, pure, crisp, perfect. There is no substitute.

Cow Manure: No, I am not kidding. I am quite serious. It's the smell that lets me know I am almost home. When I'd drive home from college and catch that first whiff from the manure that had been spread on the fields I'd get a very calm and happy feeling, then I'd take a deep breath to really get a snoot full. What can I say? I'm a hick from Pennsylvania.

The Woods: In the Spring when the earth is warming up and snow is melting and new things are sprouting, in the summer when it has just rained and freshened up after the humidity has clung to the leaves, in the fall when the leaves have come down but it's still warm and wet and things begin to rot...you just know it's a nourishing smell. And a stand of pine is a little bit of heaven. (I have to agree with Lacquer's assessment of wood, bonfires, and burning leaves too...all of that, just filing it under here)

Leather: And is it just me or does it seem like when you get a new leather item these days it doesn't quite have the same smell anymore? It's fainter, you have to work to fill your nostrils on a new piece of leather.

Men: Women's perfumes tend to drive me crazy sneezing or give me a headache. Few men's colognes or aftershaves do this to me so naturally that is more pleasant. Ralph Lauren's Polo.....oh Lord, have mercy! That is foreplay in a bottle! But beyond all that, I like man skin smell. They don't wear makeup which changes a person's smell. Preferably they don't have hair gel or gunk like that that interferes. Just clean man smell. Right from the shower is wonderful but even a couple hours later is terrific because he's had a chance to regain whatever smell makes him unique. Even if a guy comes in from just having worked up a sweat (Mr. Lime is a distance runner....I know this well!) A fresh sweat (and I stress fresh, not when he's gotten all crudded up and stewed in his own juices all day and into the next) on a guy is pleasant in a way (the fermenting running clothes are quite vile, however). I like rolling over onto Mr. Lime's pillow even after he has gone and knowing just by the scent that it's his pillow.

Sex: Oh don't act so shocked. Falling asleep under a blanket of new musk blended by two well sated lovers is so wonderful. I'm quite amazed how the individual bouquets are so enlivening beforehand and during, yet have such a soporific effect afterwards. Of course it can lead to...

Clean baby: Not all perfumed and powdered, just clean and soft and pure. Stick your nose in where their fat little cheeks meet their necks and snuffle a bit...mmmmm. The baby likes the closeness and you'll smell a bit of innocence and peace. Of course, even when my kids got older I still liked to nuzzle down into their necks when we'd cuddle and breath them in. Sometimes it was a game of snuffle tickles, I'd snuffle them, they'd snuffle back, I'd dissolve in a fit of uncontrollable laughter first usually because my neck is so ridiculously ticklish.

Ripe summer fruit: Berries and peaches and plums and melons. Ripe sweetness hanging heavy in the air like the full fruit dragging down vines or tree limbs.

Farmer's Markets: Yep, go back to Zern's and have your nose bombarded by a million smells...the livestock auction, the produce stands, the barber shop, the Amish chicken stand with rotisserie birds and fried mushrooms, the used books, the leather stands, the spice stand and loose tea shop, the bakery stands.....ooo, the sticky buns just crawling out to grab you by the nose and pull you over (will that be with nuts or without? yes, please), some guy with a cigar (which is a smell I actually hate but it's all part of the experience), the folks who just had their one bath of the week and the ones who are due for it. I could go on and on, it's an olfactory field trip or a scavenger hunt or a test (blindfold me and I'll smell my way through here).

Books: A new book has such a wonderful smell. It smells crisp and of promise, like a blind date who really scrubbed up and maybe threw on just a hint of fragrance hoping you'll like it and be impressed with the effort. An old book, especially one you love, is like that whole rolling over on the pillow thing. Might be kinda stale but it's familiar and comfortable in its mustiness. I'm broken in, I've stood the test, come sit down and spend some time.

Fabric: Ok, Lacquer explained wood very well. Even someone who isn't a carpenter can grasp that. This might be a bit trickier (back me up, Susie) but if you sew a lot or grew up with a mother who did you should get this. There is sizing on new fabric that leaves once it's been washed but until then it hasn't had the chance to acquire a laundry smell or a human smell. If a bolt sits around for a while it might get dusty and take that on some. It's not entirely the smell of starch. It's just the scent of potential. Just like Lacquer said different woods smell, so do different fabrics. Cotton doesn't smell like silk doesn't smell like rayon doesn't smell like wool doesn't smell like polyester. If you have to press out a seam or a dart as you are sewing the heat of the iron completely changes the smell of the fabric. Throw in some fusible facing or add some tailor's chalk or the tracing papers with special inks to mark out where you have to put darts and such. If you are an old time quilter you might get a block of beeswax to run your thread through, gives it strength and helps it slide through the thick layers of fabric and batting. Now there are all sorts of high tech threads and synthetics that do that job for you but they sure don't smell like beeswax and cotton thread. And then there's the accumulation of lint and fuzz in the sewing machine and the oil for the little motor. A sewing room that is used often is a beautiful bouquet of subtle smells that indicate practical creativity.

Trinidad: If you've been in a country other than where you've been born and raised you understand what I mean. A different country just smells completely different and I think when you get on some relatively sterile airplane and speed off and land somewhere else and can disembark on the tarmac and have a whole nation of aromas whack you in the face all at once you really grasp that. I still remember the first time I got off the plane and got a whiff of Trinidad. A distant saltiness, faint spice, lingering fruit and deeply foresty smells (A year later a foggy early autumn morning in Pennsylvania replicated that heavy base. I inhaled deeply and sighed.) all mingled in the humid blanket of scents that wrapped around me. It's deeply organic. Tobago didn't even smell like this, Tobago smelled more 'cleansed'....like it was 'sanitized for your protection.' Trinidad smelled real.

Cooking smells: Crimony, I could do a month of posts just on this! I'll limit myself though to the most nostalgic...Marjoram. To this day it reminds me of my grandmother's chicken pot pie. No, not that junk in a pie pan with a flaky crust. Anyone from Pennsylvania knows that's not pot pie (back me up, Lacquer...) Pot pie is a stewy thing, chicken with gravy and potatoes and thick homemade egg noodles and carrots and onions and simple seasonings. Marjoram is the most pungent of them. Even now when I cook with it I crush it up between my palms before I dump it in my pot. Then I cup my hands around my nose and inhale slowly and for a moment I am a kid back in Mom-mom's kitchen.

Chocolate: Yeah, big surprise there. If you've ever been to Hershey, Pennsylvania the whole town smells of chocolate. I thought that was heaven...until I drove through a cacao plantation on Trinidad. I am not kidding when I say that it was intoxicating. I think I had a human version of cats in catnip or a replay of the poppy fields in Wizard of Oz only in chocolate. I think every nerve ending wired to my nose was tingling and every pleasure spot in my brain was set on a steady buzz. I would have been most susceptible to any kind of suggestion during that drive.

So tell me, what are your favorite smells?

Aussie Tuesday

Bloody hell, mate! I had a whole post all typed out and then lost the bugger! Alright, I won't whinge. I'll just get on with it.

Back at Christmas, you may recall I became a landowner in Australia when Mr. Lime bestowed upon me the title to one square meter of Queensland. I've got a lot of learning and adapting if I am going to be a proper Aussie landowner.

This past week a very sweet person provided me with my very own Australian flag and a bottle condom (I love them both!) so I thought I'd start learning about the flag.

*image and information take from wikipedia.com

The current design was approved in 1954. It's comprised of 3 main elements. The Union Jack, the Commonwealth Star, and the Southern Cross. The Union Jack obviously indicates Australia's history as a British colony. The Commonwealth Star in the lower left originally had 6 points to represent the six originally federating states. The 7th point was added for the Territory of Papua and now represents all external territories. The southern Cross is the brightest constellation in the southern hemisphere and has been associated with Australia since it's earliest days as a colony. One of the flag's designers was 14 year old Ivor Evans, who wanted the four points of the constellation to symbolize justice, prudence, temperance, and fortitude. the blue field is said to represent the ocean, the journey to Australia, the sky, and as a reminder of the early Eureka flag.

In recent years there has been some push to redesign the flag and remove the Union Jack so there is a greater demonstration of Australia as a sovereign nation. A notable advocate of this view is former PM Paul Keating.

Interestingly, in the package that contained my flag and cooler there was also a current newspaper with a surprising article. Apparently, the organizers of this years Big Day Out rock festival scheduled for Australia Day in Sydney banned the national flag. They planned to confiscate any flags or bandannas bearing the flag. They had branded it as gang colours being used as a racist symbol disguised as patriotism.

So the question is...can I fly it on my own land or not? If I do, should I just tell the authorities to bugger off?

Random Bullets of Crap

Well thank heavens THAT is over. The Colts won, yada, yada.....can we get on with life now? A few blissful football free months...I am so happy. Now onto the randomness...

• Math problem: I went to help get some fundraising stuff together at Calypso's school. We had to prepare 1200 packets. We started and then the principal came to inform us there was a mistake in the letter that was included and we'd have to put labels on the letters to correct the problem. The secretary brought us a stack of labels in a panic. I ONLY HAVE 200 LABELS!!! I looked at her hand and it looked like she was carrying just shy of half a ream of label sheets (in case you don't know, a full ream is 500). The lady in charged asked her how many labels on a page. Secretary said 30. I said well it looks like you have 200 sheets not 200 labels so if they are all printed we have way more than we need. Boys and girls, if we have 200 sheets of 30 labels each sheet and only need 1200 labels how many extra labels do we have? I explained the math to the secretary who continued to insist most strenuously she had merely 200 labels and had rush ordered more to print out and would have them after lunch. I was getting nowhere. I just hope she types better than she counts. In lieu of that, I hope she gives good head because she's got to earn that paycheck my taxes go toward somehow. As I mindlessly labelled letters I tried to figure out how much surface area of her desk might be covered by the extra 4800 labels we already had.
• At times I think I like being part of the demographic that is now being courted by the media. It means Prince was the halftime show...and THAT was the only thing I paid ANY attention to. He rocked! It means the Police are reuniting for the Grammy Awards, which I haven't watched in ages. I am so excited. I'm not real big on hearing 'Roxanne' and 'Purple Rain' rendered as Muzak at the mall though. That's just wrong on so many levels.
• Winter has officially hit us finally. It's a frigid 5 degrees Fahrenheit. However, if it is going to be that cold we should at least have some pretty snow to look at. Yes, I know my OK and WA readers are quite sick of the stuff. I am sorry.
• If one has a wall in one's bedroom which has been gouged beyond simple spackling repair due to a particularly horrific wallpaper removal (may the inventor of wallpaper and the designer of fluorescent flowered wallpaper suffer horrifically) and one's husband states how much he hates spackling and that he is not sure he has the skills or tools to skim coat the entire wall...then if said wall sits in the gouged state for roughly a year and no progress is made toward repair, and if a friend of the wife sees said wall when the two women are bonding over quilting and the friend suggests her husband might be able to help.....if the husband with the skills offers to help repair the wall at no charge and the man with the gouged wall consents to such help does the owner of the gouged wall retain the right to sulk when the man who offered to help comes over to do so? Apparently, I have interfered with some territorial rules here by arranging to have my wall fixed at no cost. It was a coooooold night at House of Lime and I ain't talking about the mercury.

Friday 55 & Da Count-Cacao!

FRIDAY 55

Ok, it's not true Friday 55 but...I have about 4000 little word magnets all over my fridge. It's called Magnetic Poetry. I keep a little notebook out there so I can record whatever people come up with. Sometimes there are very lovely little poems, sometimes things get quite bizarre (current example: 'elephants can fly up your butt when you are not looking' courtesy Isaac). I've noticed a theme among mine....see if you can identify it.

I

want to

eat chocolate

have tiny dress size

not likely

so dream

on

1/02

I want to swim in

a thousand pounds of

luscious, dark, smooth

bittersweet chocolate.

Let it smear my skin and hair.

3/02

run your fingers lightly through my hair

let its darkness fall over your hand

like liquid chocolate.

3/03

DA COUNT

Well, I've done all manner of complaining the last couple of days. It's not all due to Blogger. There have been a number of highly irritating things going on here at House of Lime and I've been all too happy to let anyone know who will listen what my list of grievances were. Doesn't that make me a fun person to be around! (Thank you Renny and Lacquer for the gentle reminders in comments to not be so miserable) Good thing it's Friday and time for Da Count (thank YOU, Lecram!)...and none too late.

Nothing profound or moving here this week but after a long, irritating week and much grouchiness I was reminded Mr. Lime would not be home last night until near bed time. I had one sick Limelette with little or no appetite and two others who I just knew were going to be in a foul mood over dinner no matter what it was. Cooking was not going to be worth the effort. We scavenged for leftovers and then I made this. Go look, right now. I'll wait...

All done? Good. Now the stuff may be called Upside Down Chocolate Pudding but I am renaming it 'Sex on a Plate' because it's that good. (Bless you, Trinigourmet, for sharing this!) All warm and gooey and sweet and sticky and chocolatey...mmmmmmmmmm...excuse me, I think I need a private moment here....Oh, sorry. I got distracted there. Anyway, the stuff was a hit. Everyone was happy as the house filled with the smell and then as they scarfed it all down.

I built a fire in the fireplace, curled up under my favorite woolly blanket on the couch and breathed a sigh of relief. So this week I am counting folks who give gentle encouragement to be a better person, a crackling fire, a warm blanket, and the rejuvenating power of melty, warm chocolate all over my face and fingers......mmmm......excuse me...that's soooo good!

Have a great weekend.

WTF????

We interupt this Thursday for a Lime rant....

Ok, easily 75% of the blogs over on my sidebar will not show up. Blogger errors. Cannot complete request. Ah yes, New and Improved Blogger, now with 75% reading to do, cruise through your sidebar in seconds without being distracted by actual posts you might want to read. Bite me, Blogger.

We now return you to regularly scheduled HNTing (post below) or whatever other bullshit and hijinx Blogger may pull.

HNT-Tie Dye #2, Give Me a Hand

I was going to just show you my tie dyed gloves since it is finally cold enough that I need to wear them. After my first tie dye entry I got told I wasn't showing enough skin so I took one glove off to show my dye stained hand from when I unwrapped the last batch of items I was dyeing. The top picture doesn't really do justice to how colored my skin got or to my groovy glove. So I took the next picture so the glove showed better but you can see even less of the stained skin. Oh well, you'll live.

Happy Tie Dyed HNT!