Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Signs, signs, everwhere are signs

I had to go pay my homeowners insurance the other day. As I stood waiting for a clerk I noticed a sign on the wall that read...



Hhhmmm, my knee jerk response to that is...I will rot away to nothing while the worms feed on me. Somehow I don't think that is the answer the agents are hoping for though.




Then I went to the grocery store where I saw a sign advertising 'Roguefort' cheese on sale.

Now I know Roquefort is made in special bat guano filled caves in France (those French, I tell ya). I just want to ask Lecram and APJ if Roguefort is some sort of cheese produced during a fringe performance in some cave in Fresno.




A friend of mine said he recently went to an orchard with his family. While there they noticed a sign for...
ImageChef.com - Custom comment codes for MySpace, Hi5, Friendster and more
Why do I imagine a woman in stilettos, with big hair and heavy make-up, wearing a tacky leopard print mini dress working the cider press? And do we even want to imagine the kinds of diseases you could get from that cider?





Finally, Margee shared a sign she saw at a local pet shop.



Is the Lord was commanding us to liberate rodents and reptiles in preparation for His return?







26 comments:

Anonymous said...

And the sign said "Long-haired freaky people need not apply"
So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why
He said "You look like a fine upstanding young man, I think you'll do"
So I took off my hat, I said "Imagine that. Huh! Me workin' for you!"
Whoa-oh-oh

Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind
Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign'

tc

Mona said...

LOL!@ The last one. I guess when we free them the snakes will start causing trouble again & then Lord Will have something to save us from. Guess that is a time filler on His Agenda!

Bsoholic said...

Hahaha!

Ah ho-made cider, now that brings back memories. :P

Those are great.

S said...

LOL @ Ho made cider....

Now Lime, why is that store advertising Roguefort cheese with a ham picture? I dont get it.....I am so not shopping there.....

lime said...

tc, oh yeah, youcaught it. i love that song, even the limelets know it and sing along.

mona, sounds like an endless cycle

bs, do tell!

s, well i made the can label on a generator. they had a picture of ham, balloones, and explosion, or a christmas tree to choose from. i went for the ham since there is theater involved so maybe a lot of hamming on stage...ok, it's a stretch, just laugh dammit.

Keyser Soze said...

I swear Limey, your blog gets mroe surreal all the time LOL

Jeni said...

I loved the one for the cider but the last one was pretty darned good too! Funny, very funny! You should send the one for the cider into Jay Leno for one of the things he does on the Tonight show about ads and headlines and such.

lime said...

keyser, and this from someone clean and sober!

jeni, while the story is true the graphic is one i made up with a generator since i didn't have a real picture to go with it.

Anonymous said...

Those are too much fun. The bottom one kills me...I love stuff like that...are they getting ready to go away with Jesus so they have to liquidate?

Shari said...

So funny. The first one? What would I do when I'm dead? I'm dead, period. I can't do anything. Don't want to think about worms, though.

EmBee said...

Hey Lime, Thanks for the shout out. I'm with Cindra, I believe it was a liquidation sale. Or quite simply, the second coming absolutely can NOT take place as long as rodents and terrapins are held captive.

Geographically we may not be in the south but philosophically some parts of Maryland are pretty damn close.

Joeprah said...

Free turtles! Yay!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, those wacky French folk! LOL! No, it's not made here though some performances do emit a peculiar oder and the stages are always filled with hams.

david mcmahon said...

TopCat got in before me. Love the post.

With regard to the first sign, were they going on dead reckoning?!!!

BTExpress said...

LMAO! Still trying to figure out what they expect as an answer for the first.

PS
Loved your comment on my post!!!!!!! ROTFLMAO!!

Logophile said...

OK, that last one just defies any explanation.

tsduff said...

Thanks for the ham explanation... had me worried for a moment. I love Stilton, and Roguefort is always a great standin... but I didn't get the ham connection :) Bat guano? Well, what I don't know can't hurt me... la la la la la I can't hear you.

SignGurl said...

You know how much I love signs!

Anonymous said...

I was going to ask if there was enough, could I get in cider.

lime said...

cindra, wwell, i guess you can't tke it with you

shari, pretty much what i was thinking...about nto being able to do much...

margee, but MD is below the mason dixon line!

joeprah, free turtles with every conversion!

lecram, thanks for the clarification!

david, dead men tell no tales, nor do they buy insurance

bte, i am glad i was nto the only one confounded

logo, indeed it does

tsduff, i prefer my cheese mold and guano free

sign, you should do a post on the weird ones you have seen!

depraved, hahahaha

G-Man said...

I'll have some cider please!!!
Or some Lime-ade..
xoxoxox

Anonymous said...

Hong Kong people bring their turtles to the local park when they go on holidays. Jesus will come to us first!

Commander Zaius said...

Ho-made cider? I'd take just about anything from the lady in that picture.

Sudiegirl said...

I like the last one the best.

after all, doesn't god care about all creatures great and small? there's a hymn about it for god's sake!

Epijunky said...

It's a toss up between the "Ho-made Cider" *teehee* and the last one about the Guinea Pigs and Turtles.

You gave me a much needed laugh :)

airplanejayne said...

roguefort cheese has not made an appearance as yet at the rogue. Although, please remember: we are an unjuried festival, so pay your money and we'll let ya' do just about anything: many a stage is filled with hams...some from other countries....some that are pithy....