Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I Got Nothin...

So today we're going to play a weird little game of making wishes come true. I learned this from Snavy a long time ago. It's played like this...

The first person makes a wish. The next commenter makes that wish come true but with a weird twist and then makes his or her own wish, which is then granted by the next commenter with a weird twist, and so on and so forth.

For example.

Lime says: I wish I could eat all the chocolate I wanted and never get fat.

G-man says: Wish granted but all the chocolate tastes like liver and canned peas. I wish could go back to Florida.

Signgurl says: Wish granted but you're going to stay in the Everglades, dressed in a suit of porkchops. I wish.....

Get it? Ok, here goes...

I wish I could be on a beach right now...

43 comments:

M said...

Your wish is granted but the beach is packed full of college kids on spring break and you can't see the ocean.

I wish that I was taller, about three inches would do it.

James Goodman-Horror Writer said...

Granted, but it's on a desert island with only one coconut tree, I wish I was wakeboarding right now.

James Goodman-Horror Writer said...

doh, I'm too slow. :D

Granted, but everyone else in the world grew three inches simultaneously as well, I wish I felt as energetic as I did in my twenties...

furiousBall said...

your wish is granted, but you feel as energetic in your twenties that time you got really drunk and couldn't stand

i wish i was a better break dancer

Suldog said...

Your wish is granted, but an extremely conservative president and congress have been elected, and anything other than waltz music has been outlawed.

I wish I was a major league baseball player...

S said...

Your wish is granted but you are left handed and can only see out of your left eye which makes you twist your neck really far to bat and now your neck really hurts.


I wish I was in India....

lime said...

granted but india is a small town in west texas people entirely by a polygamist sect.


i wish i was getting a full body massage

Sheri said...

Your wish is granted but you discover that all spices in cooking make you break out in huge, itchy hives.


I wish I was thin.

lecram said...

Your wish is granted... but now the new wardrobe you have to buy costs 5 times as much because of the falling dollar.

I wish there were exotic places to eat within an easy walking distance.

Logophile said...

Granted,
but it's tiny and filthy with slow service and an incredibly untalented chef.

I wish I could go back to sleep

Keyser Soze said...

Looks like Sheri missed Lime's wish so I'm granting multiple wishes.

Wish granted: There are now 5 exotic places to eat within walking distance of Lecram but they all serve stuff like Goat's Head Soup and Rocky Mountain Oysters.

And now for Lime.
Wish granted: YOu get a full body massage but it's by 5 Chippendale's dancers...and they're all straight. You're gonna be more sore when they're done than you are now. Just in a different place.

I wish...I was a catfish
swimmin' in the deep blue sea.
I'd have ALL these pretty women
Lord, fishin' after me.
Lord, fishin' after me.

jillie said...

But you may fall back into that bad dream again.


I wish I wasn't allergic to shellfish

jillie said...

Ok...keyser snuck in there when I was answering logophile...aaahhh!

Seamus said...

Granted,
but your dreams are filled with motorcycles with no wheels.

I wish I were sailing around the world.

Seamus said...

Damn - Logo hit the motherlode didn't she? LOL!

lime said...

lol...ok...trying to get back on track here...

jillie...granted but it's like tom hanks on castaway...you can only have raw crab

seamus, granted, but you can only sail on the raft tom hanks had in castaway

i wish someone would come vacuum my carpet.

lime said...

crimony, i still missed keyser...wish granted but the woman who catches you is going to a catfish fry...


i still wish someone would come vacuum my carpet

Mona said...

Granted. I would do that gladly for YOU but my hands cannot reach across all those oceans.

I wish I had a genie who could grant me wishes

Theresa said...

Granted. But the genie has lesbian tendencies and chases you around the room until you finish making all the wishes. Hurry.

I wish I could find the inspiration to write a really good novel.

James Goodman-Horror Writer said...

Granted but it gets lost in the slush piles of all the major publishers and never sees the light of day.

I wish I could fly.

lime said...

granted but you have to dress like tinkerbell.

i wish i was on vacation

Craver Vii said...

Granted, but you have no money.

I wish my knees were strong again.

Breazy said...

granted, but now your ankles aren't doing so well.

I wish I was on a nice tropical island.......

San said...

Granted, but Rush Limbaugh is your companion.

I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner...

mssolitaire said...

Granted, but the world has become violently allergic to all things OMW-esque.

I wish love wasn't so complicated...

Sheri said...

Granted but now the mundane things like tying your shoes and licking an envelope become excruiatingly difficult to do.


I wish I had a piano.

Breazy said...

granted, but Alicia Keys keeps showing up and won't let you play it.

I wish I could go to Ireland.

M said...

Your wish is granted. You go to Ireland but you have to turn around and come right back so all you see is the airport.

Also...I will grant James' first wish that he is wakeboarding.
You are wakeboarding behind a rowboat paddled by chain smoker

I wish that I was taller, about three inches would do it.

SignGurl said...

Granted, but now you bang your head on every doorway.

I wish my migraine would go away.

Beach Bum said...

Okay your migraine is gone but now you have a tooth ache that will require a root canal which will not be covered by you health insurance and the dentist looks down in your mouth and says "Wow, I never covered anything like this in school."

I wish I had a shack on some secluded beach in Mexico.

coopernicus said...

Wish is granted and you take title just 20 minutes before the Tsunami arrives.

I wish I could still play piano

G-Man said...

Granted...But you have a hemmoroidal flare up of Biblical proportions and can't sit down to play!

I wish Pamela Anderson was infatuated with ME!!

Breazy said...

granted, but she is deflated and wrinkled when the infatuation begins.

I wish I had a new car.

jillie said...

Granted! But it only gets 1 mile per gallon and gas is $50.00 per gallon!

I wish I could wear stiletto heels again!

M said...

Granted. You can wear stiletto heels again but so can your husband/boyfriend and he wants to share your best shoes.

I wish for world peace.

Cheesy said...

Granted.... But an astroid is going to collide with Earth in 3 mins...

I wish my dog would quit farting~~~

Theresa said...

Granted, but now you start farting and everyone runs away.

I wish I had a maid.

lime said...

granted but she has terrible BO and she's incompetent.

what a lot of fun you all are. thanks for playing along everyone!

barman said...

I wish I had been here sooner so I could play along.

Great little game Lime.

airplanejayne said...

Me too!!! I can't believe I missed this one!!

:(

Craver Vii said...

This was so fun, I played with my coworkers, and then again with the family last night!

You know, I think it revealed a whole lot about my kids. I'm kinda scared now. ;-)

tsduff said...

This was hilarious - everyone has such creative answers. What a great post Lime!!!

it's a secret said...

That Snavy is a genius!