Friday, June 13, 2008

Friday 55 & Da Count-Sweet Release

FRIDAY 55


So many days have passed in this cell. I've scratched my name where I've been shackled. When I'm gone the next condemned soul will know someone else once felt the same burden in this hole. At first the sentence didn't seem so bad. It became interminable. Now my release date has come.

School's out!

(This is a rerun since it's been such a long, horrid school year for all three kids and yesterday was the last day.)




DA COUNT

Ok, so a great number of you have told me I need to come visit you and barring that I just need to escape from time to time. Wednesday night there was more strife and bad attitude from all three kids. I meted out consequences to all of them and they were protesting and telling me to go away when their dad came home. I informed him of the respective consequences for each child and that I;d been told to depart and was going to oblige everyone right now. I said goodbye very sweetly but gave no indication of where I was going or when I'd be coming home

Then I went to the library's used book sale which was having half-price day. I picked up 13 books for $7.50. BARGAIN! It was quite lovely to spend a couple of hours pouring over the huge meeting room of books. Among my finds are a giant book of snarky cartoons related to marriage, a copy of Elements of Style, a bunch of biographies, a book of quilt patterns, Whitman's "Leaves of Grass," ooohh...and a copy of The Pearl: A Journal of Voluptuous Reading: The Underground Magazine of Victorian England Apparently that last one is Victorian erotica. For 25 cents how could I resist?

After the book sale I took myself out for a very lovely dinner and enjoyed not listening to the argument of where everyone was willing to eat. I went where I wanted and enjoyed my own company. I returned home relaxed and calm and offered no explanation except to Isaac when he humbly apologized for his part in the evening and asked why I left. I have informed folks that I will happily oblige any time they tell me to go away. There seems to have been a shift in attitudes since then. Ahhh, sweet release in any form, escape or shift, is such a good thing.

Thanks once again for the expressions of support.

32 comments:

airplanejayne said...

Great! This is great!

It (sorta) reminded me of MY mom: One time when I told her that I was going to run away, she looked at me and retorted, "Don't bother; I'll go." And she left!!!! She came back an hour or so later -- but it scared the shit outta me!

lecram said...

Sometimes to disengage for a period does do the trick. :) Good count, yo!

Blither said...

Your 55's are the best!! Truly the BEST!!

I actually prefer school in. Am I a horrid mother or what? A whole 6 hours without bickering to get my stuff done... Wow. It's like a dream come true. I miss school.

mssolitaire said...

:) I think it's good to ive children just what they think they want sometimes... and when they realize they were horridly wrong then a lesson can be learned. :)

Good on you and I am SO thankful Issac came around and apologized... nice. :)

Happy Friday!

Akelamalu said...

Working in a school I KNOW this feeling! LOL

Mine's up too.

ciara said...

i know how you felt w that 55. but my girls are leaving for their dad's on tuesday, i will miss them a lot for the first 3 weeks, be ok two, and start missing them even more than when they left the last 2 wks before they come home again.

ha! i like that ya left. sometimes you just have to resort to those kind of tactics, and hey, who doesn't like nice quiet alone time??

thx for nice comment on my post :)

Suldog said...

Good for you. Lay back, read (maybe some of that Victorian erotica), and enjoy yourself. Let them take you on your own terms.

EmBee said...

Reminds me of the time when my two were small and I came unhinged one day *just ONE day? Uh, no, just this specific day* and started yelling... Part way through my 'unhingement' I stopped, looked at them and said, "I think mommy needs a time-out." I walked over to the stairs *the time out spot* sat my butt down and stared quietly into space.

With quizzical looks on their little faces, and in tentative little voices they walked over and began to ask what I was doing. I stopped them short and said, "No talking to mommy while she's in time out." After a few minutes (wishing it were longer) I stood up and explained why mommy put herself in time-out... Because she was losin' it... Control, that is. My kids had a whole new respect for the concept after this experience.

Breazy said...

sometimes walking out with no explanation of where you are going really does change some attitudes because it keeps them wondering where you are and it lets them know that you don't have to put up with such bad behavior and you know where the door is and how to use it.

Glad you enjoyed an evening on your own and that you had time to calm down and go back unruffled.

HUGS!

Kathryn said...

That is fabulous! And genius! Good for you! :)

Lavinia Ladyslipper said...

Oh this post made me so happy. I am so glad you walked out the door. It was the best medicine. I've had days like that, I've thought if I dont' get out of this house right now my brain will melt...or worse....

GOing out, a change of scene, treating yourself....its the best defence against the madness and mayhem.

So glad I popped by today to see this, and yay for your book bargains!

Rob said...

I'm so proud of you, Michelle! I'm glad you found this way to deal with the ongoing struggles with the teenage insurrection in Casa de Lime! It sounds like it was VERY therapeutic and relaxing/calming for you, eye-opening for the limelets, and perhaps is a "blueprint" for how to deal with future "incidents" where you are not shown the respect and appreciation you are due! (It's probably FAR superior to the way I might handle such situations in that you're not as likely to be charged with felonious assault as I could be!) The fact that ONE of the limelets actually "got it" and was apologetic for his part in the ongoing soap opera has to be encouraging! Hey, if you were a baseball player and were hitting .333, chances are you'd be heading to the All Star Game! Come to think of it, that's EXACTLY what you are, Michelle -- an ALL STAR mom, blogger, friend, woman! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Let me just pin this medal on your chest... (hehehehe....)

Have a GREAT weekend! (Run away again if you have to in order to escape the madness!) :-)

Logophile said...

you don't know what you've got till it's gone, too true too often, and I hope this helped your kids develop that appreciation without any permanent loss.
You still know my solution
;)

John-Michael said...

Some really cool guy who I respect (actually I love the guy!) a whole bunch, recently said "Let them take you on your own terms." Pretty darn good advice! Worth having carved in a necklace and were to remind all who see it ... "I have my own terms!" And well worthy of them terms you are, Dear Friend.

Lovin Ya ...

John-Michael said...

And if you don't want to were that necklace ... you might consider wearing it. [DUH!]

Polt said...

Ha-HA! Love the 55! Something we've all done. :)

HUGS...

katydidnot said...

i love buying library books. it makes me feel better about my overdue books.

smarmoofus said...

Oooh... nice! At first I was picturing a rough-stone dungeon and iron shackles. Then you said school's out, and the etched name went from being carved into a corner of the cell to the surface of a school desk. Happy end-of-the-school-year! Enjoyed your 55. *smile*

-smarmoofus

G-Man said...

Awesome Michelle!!!
I'm so glad you had one peaceful evening..Thanks for playing, and later...G..xox

CrazyCath said...

Absolutely brilliant. Could not have handled it better myself. You are awesome!

coopernicus said...

Book Sale???? (whimper whimper) Great bargains!!! I love book sales. We have a used book place nearby...this old victorian house that is books from to to bottom. Paperbacks are $.50 to $1 and Hardcovers are $1 to $6. That's one of my escape places...

happy summer

Jeni said...

One time, back when the ex and I were still married but after he'd been on an exception roll of drinking, womanizing, being absolutely and horrendously miserable to be around, I packed some clothes in a suitcase for all three kids and myself on a Friday afternoon, tossed the bag in the car, loaded in the kids and we left -leaving no note at all behind as to where we had gone. (Because my Mom lived next door to us and wasn't a "spring chicken" as well as knowing the potential that the ex might screw up and wreck his truck, I did give the name, phone number and addy though to my ex-sister-in-law's one sister, who I was close to and who lived next door to my Mom too! The kids needed that breathing room then, just as much as I did and believe me, I desperately needed it at that time! Came home feeling much like a brand new person and even semi-civilized too!
And book sales -best one I know of takes place every spring on the Penn State main campus, sponsored by the AAUW (I think that's the letters -American Assn of University Women) it last for 5 days I think. On the last day, it is $5 for all you can stuff into a paper bag. One year, I came home with 30 some books -all different topics and types for my $5 donation to the organization. Come up an check it out sometime. It's awesome!

citizen of the world said...

Sounds like you handled it perfectly! Good for you for just going andenjoying yourself.

Charles said...

A lesson in "be careful what you wish for..." :D

Moosekahl said...

Kudos to you for just leaving! I have threatened that in several situations but never been brave enough to just walk away and let things simmer. I'm a fixer. Have to make sure things are "right". Of course, sometimes it's okay to let the other one's do the simmering and just go do something. Sounds like it was a much needed escape.

The Zombieslayer said...

I've bought Elements of Style more than once and read it five or six times. Sometimes, I just read a chapter of it, the one I need.

This should be required reading in high school. It's one of the must have books.

Mona said...

sometimes it has no effect at all...

You may be on pluto.. the hell if they care..

RennyBA said...

Good to read about the shift in attitudes!

Good to know the dinner was great too - you deserve every minute of a nice and quiet quality time!

Mona said...

Lime (((HUGS)))

Cosima said...

Be careful what you wish for...

I am filing this away for future reference, it may come in very handy at my house sometime in the future. What I have already learned is that defusing a situation by not reacting to naughty words often helps. I tell my five year old to speak nice to me or not at all, and only answer to nice words. It helps.

Cheesy said...

EXCELLENT parenting my friend!!!!

Good for you mostly... sounds like you need more "me" time IMO

Remeinded me of the time about 22 years ago.. 2 of my sons one was 15 one was 4...fast friends for the most part but LOVED to bicker and wake me up [worked the graveyard shift at the time] Well after 3 wake ups and warnings.. I got out of bed grabbed a suitcase and threw some of their clothes in it... opened the door tossed it out then grabbed each by the arm and tossed THEM out. I can remember the looks on their faces like it was yesterday.. and the looks on the other 3 kids' faces.
It was a priceless moment~~ and the quietest hour of sleep I had had in some time.....
Gawd now I am grinning like a cat!

San said...

Victorian erotica for a quarter. That's what I call thrifty escapism. And your 55 treats that theme with power and economy too.

The family dynamics sound difficult right now. How lovely that you took yourself out to dinner. Keep up that sweet relationship with your own heart. The gifts. The dinners. The quality time. Everyone will benefit I'm sure.