Sunday, August 23, 2009

Just in Case I Should Fail to Post...

...you may want to check news reports for a Pennsylvania woman who is now in prison after intentionally smashing her husband in the head with the tailgate of an old minivan.

I came home from a night away to find Mr. Lime sanding spackle in the den and all the contents therein covered in a layer of spackle dust.

The den is where we have an entire wall of books.

There are 4 large pieces of upholstered furniture and a rug.

Finally, and this is the one that really made me hit the roof...

It is also where my sewing machine and all the pieces to Diana's quilt are. The quilt which I have already spent countless hours on. The quilt which I am trying desperately to finish in the next few days so it is ready for Diana to take to college.

NONE of the aforementioned items were removed from the room or covered protectively before sanding commenced (nor was I given notice prior to my departure that he intended to sand while I was gone in order that I may have moved the sewing machine and quilt) even though we earlier discussed the need to make sure this occurred in order to prevent a huge mess AND aggravation of symptoms for the 3 members of this household who have asthma.


Should I successfully suppress my more violent desires and get the quilt cleaned up and in order I will post about something more generally edifying as soon as possible.

22 comments:

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

I guess you screamed something like WTF?? Men!!

I heard today the joke..

WHy does it take milions of sperm to get a woman pregnant.?? because they wont stop and ask directions!

secret agent woman said...

Just let us know your prison address - we'll visit.

Jazz said...

Breathe. And if that doesn't work I'll bring you a file baked into a loaf of bread. Truly I will.

~Dragonfly~* said...

Boys are stupid!!! I'll post your bail!

NYD said...

Preparing cake with file inside and C-4 explosive cupcakes.

Truth is, I do shit like that sometimes.

misticblu said...

Unbelievable. Gotta hear how this plays out! Like, how long do you plan on punishing him? Might i suggest 'til christmas, when he will decide to buy forgiveness with a new serger.

Michelle H. said...

Ouch! Well, I hear prison food ain't that bad...

Desmond Jones said...

Well, as much fun as it sounds like it could be, I'm really not available to fill the position, even should it become available in the near future. . .

;)

S said...

Oh man that was really lame of him.

DUH

G-Man said...

" What a Maroun"!!!!!

Suldog said...

Cut him some slack. He has no doubt been pulverized mentally by being married to such a funny and beauteous woman. After years of dealing with your biting wit (and years of wondering just what he did to deserve a wonder such as yourself, and having all sorts of imagined scenarios wherein he loses you to someone else and he ends up lonely and forgotten) his gray matter is probably worn to a little nub. I think if you give him a kiss and tell him it's okay, he'll probably clean everything. Then again, he may clean everything with turpentine, so perhaps you're better off as is.

Craver Vii said...

(gulp) I'll try to keep this lesson in mind when I do a plumbing project Tuesday night.

Margie said...

I think a perfect recourse would be to hook up a vacuum tube TO HIS HEAD!

Er um, maybe that's what got you into this predicament to begin with.
:-(

~Dragonfly~* said...

I get the impression Suldog is trying to suck up... I think he wants the position for "second husband"!!!

Phaedrous said...

We have room here at Casa du Nord.

(M)ary said...

two words:

passive-aggressive.

crazy4coens said...

i would be PISSED!

Ananda girl said...

I too have a husband that leaves dust all over things. Sawdust... plaster dust, etc. Drives me nuts.

However, he is fixing my home when this happens. That buys him more time on earth.

But I'd be pissed too.

Jocelyn said...

I'm driving over right now to start the slapping. You can take it from there.

Hilary said...

That's what we refer to around here as "Man Brain."

Lulda Casadaga said...

Lime: After you kill him you can come and help me kill mine! :D
The camping trip went well despite his bitching and despite the fact that he accidently threw a dog leash(hard plastic base) that landed on my cheek!!
We can share bunks in prison!!! :D

Malicious Intent said...

Soooooo he WANTED to die?

There is no other reasonable explanation.