Friday, March 08, 2013

This Does Not Make My Top 10 List for Fun Ways to Avoid Going to Work

This morning I was on my way to work when I pulled the car over, called my principal and let her know I would not be in to work because I was not feeling at all well.  I went home.  Mr. Lime returned from his place of employ and then we went to my doctor's because my heart was galloping along like a Triple Crown winner and driving was exhausting.  It was disconcerting to say the least.  My doctor indicated that I was not to pass Go or collect $200 but instead I was to hustle myself off to the cardiologist's office.  As if I didn't think my pulse was already quickened sufficiently that little extra kick of adrenalin nudged it ever higher such that if my ticker were a thoroughbred a few bucks placed on my little pony would have yielded nicely in lieu of the Monopoly salary.

While sitting in the cardiologist's office gasping for breath and feeling my heart trying to pound out of my chest I gazed around and realized the mean age of my fellow patients was close to double my own.  I whispered to Mr. Lime that it was making me feel damned old.  His word of comfort was, "But honey, YOU are the hottie in the room."  Great!  So compared to octogenarians I am hot.  Wheeee!  In truth it made me laugh and I did need that.

What came next, as I continued to ponder my own mortality I could have done without.  A little old lady made her way toward me and invited me to read a little pamphlet she had explaining how I could be sure I was going to heaven when I died.  She offered said pamphlet with the words, "We don't know how much time we have left."  Thanks, sister.  I'm blessed. (insert audible eye roll)

I.kid.you.not.

Seriously, I'm creative but even I can't make this shit up.  I was glad Mr. Lime was there to witness it and share the absurdity.  He's also the calmer counterpart to my more easily riled personality so he (along with my berzerk heart rate) had a restraining influence on me.

In the end it turns out my heart is just dandy (couldn't be finer, in fact) but it was using rapid fire Morse code to let me know my thyroid is going ape shit. I was given some meds to bring my heart to a normal rate until I can get to an endocrinologist to figure out the wacky thyroid.  It is suspected that the stuff I take to prevent migraines may have masked the symptoms of hyperthyroidism for a while.

So how was your Friday?

17 comments:

Sailor said...

That stinks, glad it's not your heart though- my wife had similar problems, and has been dealing with thyroid for years now.

Hope you get meds and balanced more consistently & quickly than she has been!

Jocelyn said...

I'm sorry, but YOU WERE LEAVING ME NICE COMMENTS ABOUT MY VOMITING KID WHEN THIS HAS BEEN YOUR DAY?

You're a damn saint.

And now we worry about the thyroid. Okay, I'm in. Let's tackle this thing.

Hilary said...

Sheesh.. stressed much? So sorry you're encountering new health woes but I'm very relieved that it's not your heart. Hugs to you, M.

Bijoux said...

What an awful day! I hope you get the thyroid thing figured out. Feel better!

Beach Bum said...

So how was your Friday?

The computers at my work place credit union where I keep my middle-aged male slush fund account crashed five minutes after I walked in the door Friday morning.

I stood in line for 15 minutes waiting for them to reboot while dreaming of my favorite bar in Charleston and the she-crab soup it serves. After a partial reboot the computers crashed again and the credit union manager told us all it might take a lot longer to get things going.

Long story short I waited as long as possible then went home and cleaned the bathroom, the living room carpet, and started laundry.

My credit union is all the way across and when I was done at home didn't feel like driving back. My trip will have to wait for another weekend.

Yeah, it's a first world problem. Hope you are feeling better.

Suldog said...

Damn. This just plain sucks. Better than a heart attack, I suppose, but...

Best I can do is remind you (sort of like the little old evangelical lady - sorry!) that God sometimes gives us a blessing in the disguise of a kick in the ass, so maybe this is a good thing. Let it play out with as little anxiety as possible, he said from the comfort of his chair and with no similar diagnosis hanging over his head.

I'll say a prayer, of course.

(not necessarily your) Uncle Skip, said...

I don't I can add anything to what Sully said.

I, like you, feel the same way about stranger offering advice.
My response wants to be, "Get off my lawn!."

G-Man said...

Trini...
At least your Hubby thought you wuz Hot!

S said...

Haha when i had my mammogram, I thought, at least the radiologist gets to look at something pretty! LOL (youre so vain...)

Leave It To Davis said...

So glad it wasn't your heart...or your heart wasn't the cause of your heart beating out of your chest.

And you need to give your hubby a big hug and kiss for that remark. That was really sweet....even if you WERE the youngest one there!

coopernicus said...

it must be the weekend for it as the church door-knockers descended on my neighborhood this weekend by the van-load, just checking on my spiritual well being. how thoughtful.

glad it wasn't heart related.

Kat said...

Oh, those damn thyroids are the cause of so many flipping problems. BAH!
SO glad it wasn't your heart though. That had to be scary. And I'm not one to punch little old ladies, but it seems she had one coming. ;)
Hope you can get your medications settled quickly and are feeling like yourself again in no time!

(M)ary said...

wow! I am so glad you are alright. seriously. don't go to heaven yet...keep that pamphlet for 40 years from now.

Secret Agent Woman said...

Boring, but better than yours!

Wow, proselytizing in the cardiologist's waiting room. That's crazy AND funny.

(An aside - it's such a weird bit of synchronicty when you are reading a blog and discover that that very person is busy commenting on yours. That just happened!

Dave said...

Take care Michelle. Best wishes and hoping you get on top of those health problems soon - Dave

Daryl said...

wow .. thank you for this .. recently i have had a few weird moments and now i know i need to get to the doctor and have him give me that new script for a higher dose of my thyroid med ... last blood work showed the dose i am on was too low but i poo-poo'd it saying it was stress .. glad you are ok and glad you wrote this .. i will delay no more ...

Craver Vii said...

The only proselytizing I have been subjected to is by cults. Usually, we end up in a very amusing conversation. I expect that I'd enjoy a reminder about heaven, but I wasn't standing in your shoes, so that is not a judgment regarding your reaction. I suppose that I could very well have responded the same as you did.

My most recent medical drama was that when doubling one medication didn't work, they added something else to give it a 2-week boost. I complied, but it was disconcerting that one of the possible side effects was man-boobs. Oh, the shame!!!