Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Mark Leslie's Silly Christmas Lyric Meme

Mark has started a fun meme about what lyrics to Christmas songs we find silly. He wants to know what makes us laugh or scratch our noggins or raise an eyebrow as if to say, 'huh???' Look, he even designed this groovy little button just for it. That's a seriously dedicated meme writer! Either that or he's a procrastinator extraordinaire, one at whose feet I should sit as he dispenses wisdom in the ways of avoiding productivity. But I digress....

Mark Leslie's Silly Christmas Lyric meme

I saw three ships come sailing in,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
And what was in those ships all three,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day?

Mary mild and Christ were there,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
And all the bells on earth did ring,
On Christmas Day in the morning

What in blue blazes do sailing ships have to do with Bethlehem, donkeys, and stables? Inquiring minds want to know. Where did they find a sailing ship in the Judean desert? And if they could find a ship why did they have to bother with a stable at all? Maybe they should have skipped the sailing ship and gone for an aircraft carrier. I'm told they have fairly extensive medical facilities on board. Mary could have delivered in a nice, clean, well-equipped hospital type environment if they had just put forth the effort. And what's this bit with every bell ringing? Is there historical documentation of every bell in the world simultaneously sounding the day Christ was born?? I mean really....

Yesterday in a fit of silly desperation I braved the crowds and voulntarily entered a Walmart. I needed groceries and to finish some Christmas shopping. It was utter madenss. As always the lines were outrageous. Why they build 20 checkout lines and even at this time of year only have half of them open is way beyond my understanding, but again I digress. I found a line that seemed relatively short and joined it. I had two separate orders, which I am sure made the people behind me less than happy. I was hurrying to get my stuff on the belt and the cashier made eye contact, smiled, and told me not to hurry myself. She chatted pleasantly as she rang everything up. She packed bags properly (Oh, I can't tell you the joy that is a properly packed bag! Seriously, I get a bit annoyed when they put 2 small things in a bag and call it full, or they smash the bread with cans or whatever. Her bags were a thing of beauty....wait, that sounds REALLY bags, people! Don't get pervy on me! Ok, I'll stop digressing) Anyway, pleasant demeanor, properly packed bags, efficient and accurate execution of duties...I told her when she was done that whatever she was being payed she deserved double because of all that. I think she almost got a tear in her eye when she said, 'Thank you, it's very rare that people acknowledge that.' Folks, this is a crazy time of year to work retail. If you get good service be sure to tell the person how much you appreciate it.

In other news, I've heard from Susie in India. She sends her greetings to one and all. She is also enduring a rather nasty case of Delhi belly which is putting a big crimp in her travelling style. Feel free to leave her some well wishes either here or at her place.


Anonymous said...

Seems my Friday 55 was more prophetic than intended.

Wal-mart + good service!!? Isn't that an oxymoron? Youshould have paid her more.

Anonymous said...

"Jingle Bells
"Batman Smells
"Robin Laid an Egg"

HOw fricken desperate did Robin have to be to screw an egg!!!???

"Ambrose the Shiney-assed Antalope
Had a very shiny ass
And if you ever saw it,
You would swear its made of glass.

All of the other antelopes
Used to laugh and call him queer.
They never let poor Ambrose
Play near any reindeer's rears.."

Ahh... that takes me back to Robin wanting to lay an egg.

Heather said...

You braved Wally World, eh? Kudos.

And the grocery bag thing is a thing of beauty. I purposely separate my groceries into categories (cold stuff, not cold stuff, then separate both by packaging type.) I'm anal that way. It drives me banans when I have a box of granola bars in with my cheese.

Anonymous said...

How about the fat guy that was at the Nativaty? You know, Round John Virgin, Mother and Child...

Rainypete said...

The ships had the rum on them. That's why all the excitement. It happened to be on Christmas Day so they play it as a carol that's all!! I'd run around town ringing bells if three ships' worth of rum was coming my way too!

Blither said...

I've never found a nice checker at Wally World. NEVER. You so lucked out. Maybe your store also has strapping lads on clearance?

Poor Sus! :( Tell her I send my .. Umm.. Well wishes. :)

Mark Leslie said...

Maybe there were some good drugs going around, and they imagined the ships (and of course the fact that they could hear ALL the bells in the world . . . and naturally, see the music too.....)

I know why they build 20 cash desks and only use half of them - because they KNOW that you'll always HOPE they'll all be open one day, and thus you risk another visit.....

Best wishes to Susie - hope she feels better soon......

AndyT13 said...

Best wishes to you and Susie.

lecram sinun said...

Blame the commercialization of the season on Dickens. Until the publication of A Christmas Carol... the day was entirely a simple family affair. Perhaps we should start a Crachit Christmas Movement... no presents, a simple dinner and the kids get to drink gin. LOL!

Mel said...

wow a nice clerk at Walmart? she must be new, the ones I seem to get are all mass bundles of nerves.

Glad to see you received and respected nice service. From a girl behind the till (been working my butt off hence the long space between visits) during the holiday season it means ALOT when it's acknowledged. I know it always warms my heart when someone sincerely says thank you to me.

Merry Christmas to you and yours Lime!!

Breazy said...

I am like that about my bags . I want them packed correctly and have done them myself a time or two . I even organize all the stuff for them on the belt . Cold with cold , dry with dry and so on but some people just don't care and you don't want to be around me if my bread gets smashed , my evil side comes out! LOL! I hope Susie feels better soon !

Anonymous said...


This week at work we were chatting about Christmas songs. I could not believe there was a song about three ships. Helloooo.....the person who wrote that song must have flunked Geography and Bible Study.

Anonymous said...

Lime, funny observations! And I like how you did the text in red and green.

Yesterday in a fit of silly desperation I braved the crowds and voulntarily entered a Walmart.

OK, you're insane. I'm leaving now.

Anonymous said...

Nice post Lime... I get really ticked at people who get pissy with checkers because of the long lines. They act as though they're the only ones being inconvenienced. My heart goes out to anyone in retail this time of year, because they're more often than not bearing the brunt of everyone's holiday stress. Kudos to you for spreading some holiday cheer!

airplanejayne said...

"God wastes thee merry gentlemen..."

does God kill happy people on christmas?!?!!?!?!?!?

~TVS said...

I was with friends a few days ago when the following lyrics played:

In the meadow we can build a snowman
and pretend that he is Parson Brown
He'll say, "Are you married?"
We'll say, "No, man,
but you can do the job when you're in town."

So one of my friends pipes up with, "You can do the job when you're in town? How do they get away with that? Those are the dirtiest lyrics I've ever heard...."

Ameratis said...

You went into Walmart this time of year? You brave brave woman!

I try extra hard to at least smile to all retail workers during this time of year and thank them because I know what it is like to be in that position.

Happy Holidays to you :)

Mark Leslie said...

I'm trying to juxtapose the three ships sailing into Walmart with the bells on the cash registers ringing.....(have I mentioned I'm easily confused?)