Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Weird Wednesday- Questions for God

And now we milk the farm experience for all it's worth in a Weird Wednesday post.

Diana has always been an inquisitive sort and perfectly comfortable with asking whatever question she has whenever it pops into her mind. The trip to the farm when she was just a preschooler led to a few questions. She noticed the cows udders and asked what they were. She had names for every other body part but this one was escaping her. I gave her the word "udders." She asked what udders were for. Conveniently, her baby brother was a nursing infant at that time so an explanation was pretty simple. "Well, just like when your brother drinks milk from me when he is hungry, the calves drink milk from their mothers by sucking on the udders." Diana pondered this for a minute and then exclaimed in a disgusted tone, "Eeeew! Why'd God put the cow's bosoms down by the cow's bottom?! Mommy, I'm glad people bosoms aren't near their bottoms!"

Here we have the calf from yesterday discovering what really goes on in the corn crib.

Yesterday's trivia questions got only the most tepid response from all but G-man and a commenter named Rob who doesn't have a blog I can direct everyone to. So for those interested, here are the answers.

Collective nouns for respective groups of animals are as follows...

A Gaggle of Geese (on the ground)
A Skein of Geese (in the air)...
bonus points for knowing
A Warren of Rabbits

A Herd of Cattle

A Flock of Sheep
A Flight of Birds (No, G-man, it's NOT a cooter of birds)
A Kindle of Kittens

A Dray of Squirrels
A Swarm of Bees

A Brood of Pigs

A Muster of Peacocks

A Nide of Pheasants(on the ground)

A Bouquet of Pheasants (in the air)
bonus points for knowing

Since Barman wondered about the collective noun for Limelets I will let you all know it can be a howl, mess, herd, or rumpus of Limelets depending upon the situation. Generally, I'd consider them a rumpus of Limelets.

Neutered forms of animals are as follows...(Ok, I figured it was understood that neutering meant castrated males since females are "spayed" when the gonads are removed)

Cattle: Bulls become steer
Horses: Stallions become geldings (Way yo go Suldog)
Swine: Boars become barrows
Chickens: Roosters become capons
Sheep: Rams become wethers
Goats: Bucks also become wethers (And as Rob pointed out, goats look like they have the biggest balls, pound for pound, of any farm animal.)

Rob then went on to detail the various gestation and hatching times of assorted farm critters. He was correct on each one. If you are really interested go look at yesterday's comment. Personally, I was most impressed and as I told him, he either completely proved his farm cred beyond any shadow of a doubt or he is a mastergoogler. (Get your minds out of the gutter, people!)

Regardless, congrats to G-man for knowing his groups and congrats to Rob (who really has that whole reproductive thing down pat) for grabbing the rest of the quiz by the balls and, doing really well!

Finally, I threw in a bunch of animal related idioms thinking that was easy enough for everyone to give a try. No bites. Crimony, you all must have had one heck of a weekend and your brains were hurting bad. So without further ado the answers are...

Strong as an...ox
Fat as a...pig

Slow as a...turtle

Gentle as a...lamb

Cuddly as a...kitten
Quiet as a ...mouse

Hungry as a...bear

Faithful as a

Contented as a...cow
Happy as a ...lark

Quick as a ...bunny
Proud as a...peacock

Graceful as a...swan

Busy as a...beaver

Stubborn as a...mule

Silly as a...goose.


BIG Omi said...

wow... that calf's pic is really cute... he looked very scared...
Good Post,
i liked it..
Take care ,

Margie said...

I was game but lacked the time... Reading the answers now I doubt I would've faired too well. Though there were a few I knew.

I do have one for you though -
A MURDER of Crows.
I always liked that one, very E.A. Poe, don't you think?

Thanks for the Animal Husbandry lesson!

Mona said...


My son asked me to that! then when I refused,he went to my mom & told her to go on her fours so that he could 'suckle' like a calf on her 'udders' ( as mom was refusing to do so) .

And would you believe it! My mom complied to his wish!!

( of course she did not bare her 'udders', It was just a pretending game... but Ewwwww! what a game!)

ps> I added some more peacock pictures on my post!

Sheri said...

I love that calf picture! His eyes are too much!

San said...

Udderly funny story about Diana. And of course I love the calf picture.

Where I grew up they used to say "happy as a dead pig in the sunshine." No, I didn't get it. Still don't.

M said...

yeah well. it would have been nice if God had put some space between a woman's coochie and her bottom. would have saved us all from getting UTI's...

Kathryn said...

I'm pretty glad my boobs aren't by my butt too.
I love that pic. Too cute!

furiousBall said...

that is one cute baby cow. the cutest and only one i've seen today. you win

G-Man said...

One glaring ommission from yesterday's 'related idioms"

Hotter than a..."Two-Peckered Goat"

OK...Two ommissions..

Useless as..."Tits on a Boar Hog"
(Pigs are quite descriptive eh?)


Rob said...

Just a coupla points of clarification, Michelle. It's my understanding that "neutering" literally means to render incapable of reproducing -- hence it can refer to what is done to EITHER gender of a species, i.e., castration of the male or spaying of the female.

And I think that cows have just one "udder" (singular) that comes (normally) with 4 fully-developed -- and sometimes a couple of nascient -- teats.

But we're splitting hiars here and I thoroughly enjoyed your "down-on-the-farm" pics and quizzes. Lotsa fun stuff there!

And the reason I didn't take on the idioms challenge was because I would probably have messed it all up. Like my guess would have been "cuddly as a BEAVER" (or "silky as a beaver" -- but that wasn't even mentioned as a possibility)! ;-)

Oh, and G-man, that old expression "useless as tits on a boar hog" was obviously coined by someone other than a farmer. Anyone who ever raised pigs knows that "tits on a boar hog" actually ARE important in that the number of nipples that a boar has helps determine the number of nipples that female piglets he sires will have. When they grow up (become gilts, then sows) and begin having litters themselves, the more "teats" they have, the more little piglets they can effectively nurse. The bigger the litter and the better they are "fed" by the sow, the more profit to the farmer. SO, "tits on a boar hog" are actually not "useless" but an important consideration in the overall economic landscape for a swine-producer. It's just not as funny when looked at in cold, hard, financial terms! ;-)

OK, I'm done being "picky". Like I said, these posts resurrected lots of good boyhood memories for me. Thanks for sharing them, Michelle...

ciara said...

the calf looks shocked or surprised...not sure which.

as for the quiz, well, i'm dealing w my x right now and he's enough to give anyone a permanent headache!

lecram said...

LMAO... you know, I concur with Diana!


Bsoholic said...

Haha! I too am glad people bosoms aren't near their bottoms!

Funny though, I never really thought of it like that.

lime said...

big omi, glad you enjoyed

margie, yes murder of crows is one of my favorite too ;)

mona, LOL, what a scene i can just imagine it

sheri, i didn't notice the look on the calf's face until i downloaded the picture, then i laughed.

san, i'm thinking the saying should be rank as a dead pig in the sun

m, good point

kathryn, amen sistah!

furiousball, yay! i win i win! what do i get?

gman, i thought the phraase was "hornier than a two peckered billygoat"...and were those omissions or emissions?

rob, i shall direct all future farm and animal related inquiries to you. clearly you are not a man to be trifled with in this matter. i bow at the feet of a master

ciara, go to the happy place....

lecram, i thought you might!

bs, she has always had a unique perspective on things.

Anonymous said...

hey i loved the calf pic ...and i loekd thew post...!! gr8 wrk!

The Zombieslayer said...

Wondering why anyone would neuter a rooster. I've had chickens before, but just hens. Never a rooster. So just wondering.

That cow dancing cartoon was just plain wrong. Funny, but wrong. :lol:

Ameratis said...

I missed the trivia questions due to my lack of internet! Bah :( Maybe next time. I have once again managed to sneak on the somehow "not blocked for today" blogger at work again.

Fred said...

The calf sure is wide-eyed. Must be interesting in there.

Thanks for providing the answer sheet. Teachers get nervous when we don't have the answers at our fingertips.

~Tim said...

How about "Cute as a bucket of puppies!"?

BTExpress said...

I'd have never got all these even if I cheated. Thanks for given me some learing.

lime said...

vish, thanks. glad you liked the picture

zombieslayer, castrating a rooster decreases natural muscle development, thus making a more tender, flavorful bird. it also reduces the aggressive tendencies of a rooster making them easier to handle.

ameratis, sneaky girl. nice to see you ;)

fred, glad to be of service!

tim, fun as a barrel of monkeys

btexpress, aw, i think you could be a mastergoogler yourself ;)

SignGurl said...

You are the master photographer! I told you I have camera envy.

barman said...

Oh my, what did that calf see? You know so much. No wonder I never do any good at trivial pursuit.

You know if your boobs are big enough and you are old enough ... don't they tend to settle to about the same place as that there cow? Yike, I best dash after a comment like that.

Palm Springs Savant said...

very clever post today Lime, informative too. :-)

lime said...

signgurl, my camera is a seriously cheapo kodak, really i have camera envy for a real camera.

barman, run barman, run!

savant, glad you enjoyed. i'm here to educate, hehehehe