Tuesday, June 16, 2009

I'm Still Here

A few folks have expressed concern about my lack of posting on Friday or Monday. Just to explain...My mother-in-law was here all last week because Diana was graduating and Calypso was turning 16. Graduation occurred Friday night. Saturday was a big party for Calypso to have with her friends. Sunday my mom took me home with her so I could attend my family reunion. She brought me home late yesterday. I'm really exhausted by all of last week and the weekend especially.

I wish I had something witty to share but I don't. I have a bunch of pictures from the weekend and I have some post ideas floating around in my head, which is now mostly clear. When I can get it all sorted out I will put it up here. Yesterday I sold Beulah to a parts man for a pittance. I am STILL waiting to here about this damn library job. If I get it though the difficulty is how to even get to it since I don't have a car and we have no public transportation where I live. No money to get a car, no car to get to a job to make some money...I'm frustrated.

I know this crap isn't insurmountable. I am deeply grateful that I wasn't hurt worse than I was. I can't explain it but this whole mess has just knocked me emotionally in ways the whole zipline incident never did. My brain knows that in the grand scheme of things this is small potatoes. I just feel worn out by it all. Sorry this is a downer post. I'm still here...just feeling more alive and kicked than alive and kicking.

41 comments:

Suldog said...

Darlin', I wish you were within hugging distance. I'd lay a big one on you now...

(((((***HUG***)))))

All will be better. Time, you know.

Craver Vii said...

Big sigh of relief! It is good to see you back here.

I'm trying to figure out why this would be more of an emotional setback than the zipline thingy, and all I can come up with is... airbag. There's gotta be something psychologically twisted about adding something that explodes in your face while you're trying to react to an emergency.

S said...

One day at a time, missy.

(((Hugs))))

Desmond Jones said...

What? You've got a life outside of blogging? The nerve!

Seriously, it's good to see you out-and-about again. I was starting to go thru Lime-withdrawal. . .

Graduation and Grandma coming from out-of-town have been on our plate, too.

Believe me, I understand the 'Catch-22' aspects of no money to buy a car to get to work to make money to buy a car to get to work, etc, etc. . .

And I dunno, sometimes we can respond well to a crisis, but then the next one, we just kinda go, 'oh shit, not again. . .' And of course, having gotten brained first, and THEN crashing the car seemed, even from this distance, to be kinda 'piling on' by the Universe. . .

{{{hugs}}}

You'll be OK. . . What Suldog said. . .

Polt said...

Just take it one issue, one day at a time. And keep smiling. You'll feel better. And know that many of us out here are thinking of, and pulling for, you!

HUGS...

Ananda girl said...

I am so glad that you are okay and that you were busy, not ill.

Congratulations to Calypso and you too! Proof that you are a great mom, as if we needed more!

Surviving a graduation is quite a feat. I hope all those people whom you love have gone home now so that you can get some peace and let the rhythm of the universe dance you into a good solution to your troubles. Relax and let the music move you there... but watch your head! ;-)

VE said...

Sorry to hear about Beulah. Poor Beulah. It's amazing how dependent we all are on our cars. I've got public transportation aplenty here but it's such a hassle...

~Dragonfly~* said...

As I said earlier Lime, just think of your body and soul as a good martini... shaken... not stirred!!! They go down real smooth like.... and remember... this is only temporary...

One thing I did figure out a few years ago is to STOP praying for patience!!!! I realized that if I were constantly praying for patience... in order for my prayers to be answered... I would have to get trials and tribulations in response in order to practice having patience!!! Gave that up right quick!!!

Might want to check the fine print on the prayer manual...

Nothing but good thoughts being sent your way...

DF

lime said...

suldog, a supply of hugs on demand would really go a long way right now. thank you.

craver, i think the difference may have something to do with having massive amounts of painkillers in my system after demolishing my arm

s, i'm trying. thanks

desmond, yeah, it does feel like "piling on." that bit about god only giving us what we can handle...sometimes i wish he had a lower opinion of me.

polt, thanks so much. i appreciate the encouragement

ananda, letting the rhythm of the universe dance me into a solution....that sounds so nice and gentle

ve, i miss living where i could walk to whatever i needed or had cheap public transportation available

dragonfly, i have given that very warning to a number of people, lol! yes, i stopped praying for patience a long time ago.hank you kindly for the encouragement.

74WIXYgrad said...

Every time I stop here, you have something for all who read your words. So just take this time to receive from all your limers.

I find that bloggers, as a whole, are a very sympathetic bunch. Let us lift you up for awhile.

I just thank you for checking in like that.

jinksy said...

Time out is a must, every so often - don't feel bad about that. Maybe the universe decided you needed a rest? Love 'n' hugs are speeding your way...

Jazz said...

Right now you need to stop worrying and just rest up. We underestimate how much a shock like that accident can take out of us.

Dr. Jazz recommends reading a good book in a bubble bath.

Take care Lime.

Cocotte said...

I'm not going to even try to be positive....because, yes, life can suck at times. I hope the birthday and graduation were fun though and that you're feeling back to your regular self soon.

Ella said...

if i lived close by, i'd pick you up and take you to an old graveyard to walk around and look at all the headstones. somehow - that just seems like it would be comforting.

DianeCA said...

Sounds like you may still be in a bit of shock. It can take some time to get over a traumatic event. Take the time you need and relax, we aren't going anywhere.

Desmond Jones said...

I know what you mean; I can recall a time or two, remarking to God that He seemed to think I could deal with a much bigger load of crap than I did. . .

(*sigh*)

EmBee said...

{{{{{Lime}}}}}}*

*I think that means hugs to you Lime... But I've never been all that text savvy. So if I'm wrong and it means something of a sexual nature? Well, maybe that's a cure also.

Logophile said...

sigh
heavy sigh
deep dramatic sigh

I got nothing here.
you know I loves ya, babe,
wish I could make something better

seventh sister said...

just catching up on my blog reading. Sorry that you have had such a hard time.

lime said...

wixy, thank you for that validation. and yes, bloggers are an amazing bunch in a wonderful way

jinksy, forced rest eh?

jazz, ok, can you be the door guard so no one bangs on it while i soak?

cocotte, the birthday and graduation were in deed nice times. i am thankful for that too.

ella, yes, i could use that for sure.

diane, thanks. it does feel that way.

desmond, sigh...

embee, ok, you got a chuckle out of me with that comment. well done and thanks for the hug too.

logo, got a car for me?

7th sis, thanks. it has not been fun.

citizen of the world said...

Hope the job comes through soon, and you can replace Beulah.

Fortress Guinness said...

i can totally understand how this could affect you so much...

just glad you're still here babe...!!! (^_^)

still got em all crossed for ya job-wise...!!!

MWAH...!!! xxx

G-Man said...

You need a beer......

gab said...

It took me till about Feb. before I started to feel normal. I still have a fear of driving through that intersection. And now I slow down coming to a light. Im not as carefree driving any more. No that doesnt mean I wasnt careful it just means now Im to careful. My hubby hates it. As for a car we just got one here 2 weeks ago only cause hubbys boss bought it for us. Its now a real good car mainly a junker but it gets him from A to B. and I have a car so I can do whatever. I needed one mainly because I babysit 4 of my grands during the week so if I needed to go before I couldnt. Just take one day at a time. BIG HUGS

Beach Bum said...

Relax, chill, rest, take long naps, eat tons of chocolate, in other words we will be here.

Pouty Lips said...

I just came from Suldog's - Inquiring minds want to know if you tie-dye your applesauce.

Pouty Lips said...

P.S.

(((((((Huggies)))))))))))

Mona said...

Hope things will be better soon...

Shadow said...

downers are allowed. hugs to you. all will be revealed. in time...

Desmond Jones said...

I think Pouty Lips just sent you some diapers. . .

Cheesy said...

Sometimes we have downer times... it's ALL worth sharing with friends.

jillie said...

Glad to see you're still alive and it sounds like you've been a busy busy gal! I am the LAST person that would ever complain about lack of blogging. I'm the biggest slacker I know. Besides, life does happen right?

mssolitaire said...

I know things will work out and there is a silver lining to all of this. Love you sweets!!! HHUGS!!!

Hilary said...

I so feel for you and wish there was a way to help. Sending my best, healing thoughts your way. Take the time to heal. The emotional wounds are the hardest but time, and how you use it, does wonders.

Craver Vii said...

:-P

david mcmahon said...

Hang in there. Sorry to hear about Beulah, but I hope the library job works out.

Fred said...

Lots going on, Lime. I've always been amazed that you manage to post daily, but under the circumstances, you owe yourself a bit of a blogging break now and then.

Wishing you the best about the job!

lime said...

citizen, me too

guinness, thanks for the understanding and the crossed fingers

gman, how about a hard cider?

gab, it has certainly put a crimp in life to be minus a vehicle

beach bum, do you have the authority to put that in official prescription form?

pouty, tie dyed applesauce is not something i have ever attempted, lol

mona, i hope so too

desmond, she was behind the sample that came in the mailbox?

cheesy, i guess true friends tolerate the down times eh?

jillie, sounds like you've been having great fun. i am glad to hear it

solitaire, i am trying to focus on the things to be thankful about

hilary, thank you kindly

craver :P

david, hanging....

fred, yeah, i dont' have it in me this week.

Suldog said...

I think you should make tie-dyed applesauce. It would make a great blog post, anyway :-) Sort of like that Three Stooges episode where they asked a guy to mix a batch of spotted paint.

TorAa said...

Lime, you are more than excused.
Sometimes Family and own care are more important than posting on your blog.
Howevere, I well understand people miss you.
Take it as a positive compliment;-))

Jocelyn said...

Here is the encouraging thing I can type at you: Honey, you're actually allowing yourself to feel exactly as you should. There's been suck + overwhelmage, and you're allowing it to equal emotional combustion. That's healthy. It IS.