Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Slice of Lime-Driven to Insanity*

I have a choice of three different but reasonably direct routes to work.  They are each very distinct.  One takes a highway.  One takes a main road through town.  One is all back roads.  It's nice to have options because there are frequent accidents (and no I am not the cause or victim of them all, thankyouverymuch).

Early this summer construction began on the highway (and still continues).  Any time the highway gets gnarly the main road through town backs up as folks seek the alternate route.

Then they started digging up the back roads, which also diverts traffic to the main road through town.

Then they decided to tear up the main road...

and trim trees on the main street and the back roads...

and  close down bridges on the highway...

all at the same time.

Did I mention we  live in a tourist area and it's vacation season?

It's been so very special trying to find a way to work lately.

Then yesterday they strangled the road in front of our office to one lane.

I expect tomorrow they will rip up our cul de sac too.  It's just par for the course.



*No Limes were in actual traffic at any time during the shooting of this picture.  This is a dramatic recreation staged in the parking lot of work.  In fact, the key wasn't even in the ignition.  In fact, I had nearly drained my battery to the point of the car being unwilling to start after leaving my lights on because this is not even my own car.  I stole Mr. Lime's car and I'm not terribly familiar with all the controls.  This post is approved by Lime.  Reading of this post may cause severe nostril cramps, chafed knuckles, simple chronic hallitosis, gingivitis, excessive ear hair growth, palpitations, baldness, furry tongue, and personality disorders.  Erections lasting longer then four hours should be examined by me...unless you're a woman or experiencing the other side effects, in which case I'll run screaming out of the room at what a freak you've become.

13 comments:

silly rabbit said...

Ha! What a great disclaimer!

Traffic here is all screwed up too... due to improvements. Many have signs that claim "Putting Oregon back to work!" Its funny because often there are no visible workers, just cones and detours.

snowelf said...

Lime, you think that the people who scheduled the construction should be sent to the chicken farmer for punishment? Just tell 'em they're going to get a nice jacuzzi and a massage. :)

--snow

KFarmer said...

The traffic may be "special" but do my eyes deceive me? Do I SEE RAIN on your car window??? Yesterdays heat index 110~ here. We are slowly roasting. Kind of like chicken : )

Anonymous said...

Did you move to Montreal without telling me?

Anonymous said...

Did you move to Montreal without telling me?

Alice said...

hi there...
todays post here is about bloody cars!!!

this is the new space...

luv 'Alice'

(FFF)

Kat said...

Ha! I can relate! I had the same experience the other day when I was trying to get to my house. Just about every street I turned down was closed for construction. The boys said to me, "How are we gonna get home, mom?"
Gotta love that summer construction. ;)

Commander Zaius said...

The solution is obvious, just do like South Carolina and ignore the failing condition of your bridges and roads. Taxpayer money is precious, if God wanted roads and bridges maintained it would be one of the commandments.

Craver Vii said...

Ouch! My nostrils!

Gledwood said...

Hi Lime ~ Gledwood the Limey here

What I don't get about roads is WHY they choose to bury water mains and phone lines and broadband under main roads! Why not place these in the sewers where they can be accessed far more easily? I just don't get it.

Just my 2p worth....

Suldog said...

Given that look, I wouldn't cut you off even if I had an armed bodyguard riding shotgun.

Bijoux said...

Out of the 4 bridges on the way to our high school, 1 has been closed for a year, 1 is open only going one way, and 1 is set to close in the next few weeks. Someone really doesn't like education around here.

secret agent woman said...

Yeah, special. Boy I had working around construction.