We play a game in these here parts that involves having to choose which of two unpleasant alternatives you'd prefer. Generally, the questions would be something akin to, "Would you rather eat a whole jar of kindergarten paste or drink a dixie cup of Elmer's Glue?"
Earlier today I was able to generate a new question not derived from theoretical notions but from actual experience.
As I was having lunch, which includes salsa and chips I got to the end of the bag. My typical practice is to take the shards too small to dip, toss them in a bowl, and dump salsa over them so I can eat the mess with a spoon. I had just taken a big spoonful of chip shards and hot salsa when I began to feel the unmistakeable sensation of a giant slow-motion sneeze winding up.
I tried to chew faster but realized the sneeze would register sooner than I could complete the swallow, thus I'd risk a massive choking fit. My alternatives quickly boiled down to, "Would I rather stifle the sneeze by keeping my mouth closed and risking sinus cavities full of chips and salsa or just give a big unrestrained sneeze and have a lovely abstract dispersal pattern of chips and salsa to clean off the nearest surface?"
As the person generally responsible for most of the cleaning I did not wish to create a giant mess right before I was supposed to leave for work. As a person who tends not to like searing pain in her sinuses, at the last possible moment, I opted for the mess....however reflexes took over and I raised my elbow to cover my sneeze.
So much for that shirt...