I wasn't overly nervous before the interview, just fleetingly so.
I wasn't nervous during the interview...not really even a little.
As soon as I left the interview I wanted to vomit.
Why yes, I am crazy. Thank you for noticing.
So now I shall soothe myself by meme-ing the interview.
Tell me something about yourself...
Well, I was born when I was very young. I spent part of my childhood in a commune for yodelers. Because of my lack of pitch and lung capacity due to allergy triggered asthma attacks I was ejected from the community, at which point I joined a troupe of chimpanzees and found I was skilled at flinging excrement. My vocal stylings were more attuned to chimp ears as well. Later on, I studied 13th century Albanian poetry searching for insight into the great question in life such as,
"Why are hot dogs and hot dog buns sold in packs with unequal numbers?" In my free time I enjoy doing macrame with yarns I've spun from dryer lint.
If you were hired and I dropped by your classroom what would I see?
A burning in effigy of the drafters of, those who voted for, and the signer of the No Child Left Behind Law. I think it's important for even elementary students to be aware of politics, the effect it has on their lives, and the power of protest.
Describe how you approach classroom management.
We use a "push in" program as opposed to a "pull out" program. Are you comfortable with that?
Sugar, I find it works best if you alternate the two....repeatedly...until everyone is satisfied with the results.
So if you have a BS Ed, why exactly were you working at a chiropractic office?
Why should I hire you?
Look into my eyes and be quiet. You'll feel the irresistible psychic waves telling you why.
Do you have any questions for me?
When do I start?