The Part Where I Reveal My Neurosis and Inability to Keep Track of Time

So, um, yeah, I thought I posted this before I went to Maryland for a week of beach convalescence but apparently I forgot that button that says "publish."  We're gonna chalk it up to post-surg brain augmented by needing to run around like a loony trying to get all the last minute details attended to before Isaac went to Haiti and  Mr.  Lime took Diana to Georgia to visit his mother.  Then there was that bit where Isaac never got his shots and Mr. Lime's mother wound up in the hospital right before they arrived at her house and I was trying to make sure I had enough clean underwear for a week away from home.  Yeah, so um, if I worried anyone with my lack of posting sorry about that.  Here's what you were supposed to see....just to demonstrate my mind is still as whacked as ever.

Scene: over a week after surgery, Lime and her husband sit on the couch.

Her: My incision really itches.

Him: Well, take off those steri-strips.

Her: I can't do that.

Him: Why?

Her:  My neck will fall out.

Him:  The doctor just told you today they could come off.

Her:  She said I could start helping them loosen.  She didn't say rip 'em off like a bandaid.

Him: (incredulous) What?  We can't have anything with labels in this house because you peel them off as soon as you find them but you won't pull the strips off your neck?

Her:  Right, because my neck will fall out.  I have exquisite self-control under such circumstances.

Him: (rolling eyes and sighing) You neck will not fall out. Get them off.  Get some air on it.  They itch because they can't breathe.

Her: They itch because they are healing.  It can't heal if my neck falls out.

Him: You are insane.

Her: Which is why you love me.


The good news is I eventually took the strips off a couple days later and my neck didn't fall out.  However, I am still working on groovy stories for the scar.  Before the surgery when I thought the incision would be bigger I thought I'd tell people I tangled with the mafia and won.  I've also decided I may draw eyes and nose above it and ad fangs coming out of it like it's a mouth and call it Sid.  My kids have been calling me Frankenmom and Mr. Lime has been calling me Frankenwife so for Halloween I will surely need to attach bolts to the side of my neck.  Please feel free to leave your own suggestions as to bad ass or amusing stories for my scar.