Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Weird Wednesday-Who Should Be in the Cages?

'Look, a trained chimp could do this job.' is a phrase my husband and children have heard cross my lips more than once. It is my retort to complaints about doing simple jobs. 'Mom, it will take too long/is too much work to clean my room/vacuum/load the dishwasher/etc.' 'Just go do it, a trained chimp could get it done faster.' Apparently I am quite correct...

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP, Jan. 17, 2007)- An escaped chimpanzee at the Little Rock Zoo raided a kitchen cupboard and did a little cleaning with a toilet brush before sedatives knocked her out on top of a refrigerator.

The 120-pound primate, Judy, escaped yesterday into a service area when a zookeeper opened a door to her sleeping quarters, unaware the animal was still inside. As keepers tried to woo Judy back into her cage, she rummaged through a refrigerator where chimp snacks are stored. She opened kitchen cupboards, pulled out juice and soft drinks and took a swig from bottles she managed to open.

Keeper Ann Rademacher says Judy went into the bathroom, picked up a toilet brush and cleaned the toilet. Rademacher says the 37-year-old Judy was a house pet before the zoo acquired her in 1988, so she may have been familiar with housekeeping chores. Judy wrung out a sponge and scrubbed down the fridge. It took a couple of tries, but the zoo sedated the chimp, who fell asleep on top of the refrigerator with half a loaf of cinnamon-raisin bread she had pulled out of the freezer.

The zoo veterinarian gave Judy a drug to bring her around. Rademacher says Judy was groggy but fine after the episode. The zoo says there was no danger Judy would get out of the primate keepers service area and onto zoo grounds.

Did you read that? It says they sedated the chimp and presumably put her back in her cage. Are these people insane??? Poor Judy wasn't running amok. She wanted a bite to eat then she cleaned up after herself and earned her keep. She scrubbed the toilet and cleaned the fridge. I wouldn't have sedated her. I would have handed her the mop and a bucket and asked her to clean the floor. Then I'd have given her a bunch of bananas when she was done. She's cheaper help than my kids are, that's for sure! No respect for a responsible primate I say.

And I can tell you this much...if cleaning up after yourself and having a snack puts me at risk for a catching a tranquilizer dart in the butt and being locked up in a cage I'm not taking any more chances.

22 comments:

James Goodman said...

lol, that's awesome. Chimps are cool, but I hear they have a few less than desirable traits that make them less than desirable houseguests. Something to do with their fascination with feces if memory serves correctly.

Sheri said...

omg - rofl!! As I was reading this I was thinking to myself "Why the heck would they want her to stop? Let her clean.... scrubbing toilets?! She's a better woman than I am! If she's anything like me she needs a tranquilizer to clean the bathroom anyways. sigh

Very funny weird wednsday!

steve said...

That was funny!! Seems to me that chimp made all the right moves!

Anonymous said...

OOOOh, I'm taking aim right now.
MISSED!
MISSED AGAIN!
Hold still Limey(..she needs a bigger butt.)

barefoot_mistress said...

It's just...having all those bananas around your house concerns me deeply....

Jodes said...

lately I have been thinking my 3 yr old should be in a cage.

Breazy said...

Lime I think you and I need to go together and purchase us one of these cleaning chimps. I have the same problem you regarding the cleaning . If you ask someone around here to do the dishes this is what you will get as a nice no " Mom, you stay home all day , the dishes are your job plus they are all yucky and I don't want to get my hands dirty...maybe next time". This is when veins in my neck and head start popping out and I give one look that says more than any one word ever could , needless to say my dishes get done.

LOL! Thanks for the laugh and I hope you have a good day!

Ameratis said...

That is awesome! I wish I had had this article as a child to say " see mom I will get tranquilized if I clean" LOL of course my mom would have answered" I will tranquilize you" as she shook her fist LOL

Logophile said...

Some people!
I can't imagine why they would have done that, poor, poor chimp who just wanted to clean?!
That is so wrong.
Although I am a little concerned that she was cleaning the kitchen with the toilet brush.

Anonymous said...

How could you give her a bunch of bananas AFTER she had gone??? :)

Nice post. On a serious note, Animals DO clean up after them. Like cats! It is we humans who are polluting the Earth and turning it into a huge garbage can!

Seen you at many a blog. You are very witty & have a great sense of humour!

Anonymous said...

I SO need that chimp at my house.

snavy said...

Do you think Judy can do laundry?

Anonymous said...

I don't know a nice long nap where no one can bother me... Maybe a tranquilizer dart in the butt isn't such a bad idea after all?

Anonymous said...

Maybe I can hire Judy for a day or two a week. I have plenty of bananas

Anonymous said...

LMAO!!!!!!!!

I need that chimp, does she do litter boxes?

But you got admit, you kids are better looking. :)

Sorry about the anonymous blogger is messed

Have nice day.

Walker

m said...

Hm....I am thinking like a lawyer when I say, your kids have a way out of housework here.

The little Limes could say: "Mom the Little Rock zoo *wouldn't let* a trained chimp do housework because they think it is cruel. Can't we just hang out in our rooms and throw our poop around like the trained chimps do all day???"

Anonymous said...

LOL, Judy probably did a better job than my kids would have.

Anonymous said...

I think we need to find out who trained that chimp. :)

BTExpress said...

I read that too. They should have let finish cleaning.

KFarmer said...

LOL!! I wonder if they would rent Judy out to someone who has not really had the time or energy to clean her house in 7 years... Man oh man, could I use some help :)

Anonymous said...

marvelous!!! :)

Boysenberry said...

So that's why I'm falling asleep at work. It's not because I've just had lunch, but I'm being sedated after cleaning up the sides :)