1.What's your name spelt backwards?
2. What did you do last night?
Sat at the hospital with my cousins and aunt waiting for word on my uncle.
3. The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
Wouldn't YOU like to know...
5. Last time you swam in a pool?
A pool of what?
6. What are you wearing?
Is there a particular reason I have to be wearing anything? Is there a dress code for memes?
7. How many cars have you owned?
There's a giant box of Hot Wheels in my son's closet, do I really have to drag it out and count them all??
8. Type of music you dislike most?
Anything screechy, dissonant and repetetive
9. Are you registered to vote?
Yes, but I refuse to declare a party because I think they are universally full of shit and only interested in maintaining their own power as opposed to actually serving constituents. I vote every November though.
14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?
Sky diving definitely, bungee jumping maybe...the snap back of the bungee cord looks whiplash inducing and I've been there, done that, have the t-shirt.
17. What's your favorite comic strip?
Calvin & Hobbes and Far Side, though Foxtrot and Zits are acceptible alternatives since Bill Waterson and Gary Larsen stopped publishing.
18. Do you know all the words to the national anthem?
Which one, USA, Canada, Trinidad & Tobago, Australia, Tuvalu, Croatia, Malawi? What? Can you be more specific?
19. Shower, morning or night?
Shower me with love, gifts, or money any time of the day you see fit. It's all good.
20. Best movie you've seen in the past month?
Well, it sure wasn't Shrek 3
21. Favorite pizza toppings?
Green peppers and onions then sprinkle crushed red pepper and garlic powder on it...who wants a kiss? Anyone?
22. Chips or popcorn?
Blue chip stocks...
24. Have you ever smoked peanut shells?
How's the high and what's it like coming down off them?
25. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?
Have YOU been smoking peanut shells?
27. Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?
Well, like Jessica was going to sit with me until Ashley was like all snotty and stuff and then I said like you know if she was going to be that way I didn't want to sit with them you know? And so like Jessica got all in my face about it and she said she liked Ashley better anyway. And like I don't really care because Jessica thinks she is all that and we all know she isn't, you know? So like anyway, I was at the same table as that smelly kid from 3rd period geography, only I made sure there was an empty seat between us so it's not like I really sat WITH him, you know?
28. Favorite chocolate bar?
Whichever one I am eating at the moment.
29. Who is your longest friend and how long?
I don't generally ask my guy friends this question. It's a bit personal.
31. Have you ever won a trophy?
Have you forgotten the Tale of the Golden Phallus?
33. Favorite computer game?
Sneaking around to disconnect and hide one necessary cord or changing the desktop to read like a ticking bomb.
34. Ever ordered from an infomercial?
Well no, but lately I have been feeling the need to dust my face with minerals, watch a robot vacuum bump into walls, enhance someone's manhood, squeegee my car, and get some really pesky blod stains out of my laundry....
36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?
Oh gads yes, when I worked in the laundry of a nursing home I had to wear the most hideous pink nightmare.
***ALERT TO G-MAN: SCROLL DOWN NOW AND SKIP THIS QUESTION!!!!***
38. Ever thrown up in public?
Oh Lordy yes. In Hawaii during an all day trip on a catamaran to watch dolphins. Horked over the side of the boat. Thought maybe if I got into the water at the snorkelling destination the cool water would help my poor seasick tummy. I was very wrong. Have you ever puked through a snorkel? I don't recommend it. (Now just TRY to get that image out of your mind...)
On the upside, all the pretty tropical fishies love it and will swim very close to you so you can appreciate their lovely colors as you struggle back to the boat. Your snotty teenaged boatmates, however, will refer to you as 'puke-girl' for the rest of the day. Mercifully, a kindly octogenarian lady with gigantic sunglasses will take pity on you and offer dramamine which has expired over a year ago. Nonetheless, you will gobble down the maximum dose and then some before retiring to the center of the boat for the remainder of the 8 hour trip so you can sit an moan in relative peace where there is the least amount of felt motion.
Oddly, a week later I was on a boat in San Francisco Bay when the water was extremely rough and half of the passengers were turning green but I felt fine. Go figure.
***IT'S SAFE TO READ AGAIN***
39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?
True love is the greatest wealth
43. Did you have long hair as a young kid?
I had very long hair until my folks divorced because my dad wouldn't let my mom cut my hair. When he left, she scalped me.
45. Where would you like to go right now?
Wouldn't you like to know...
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