The tough economy has reached all the way to the North Pole and even Santa is feeling the pinch. He has been forced to downsize by laying off many of the elves. Then when production was outsourced he got a bunch of incompetent elves filling requests.
It will work like this. Your wish in the comments. The next commenter will play Santa and grant your request but mess it up somehow before leaving his own request.
I'd like to go back to the Hershey Spa.
Granted, but your spa technicians will not be using body wraps with chocolate. They'll be trying their new sauerkraut mixture.
I want a new Harley.
Granted but it's painted pink, has a wicker basket on the front and can't go over 10 miles an hour.
I want to go to India now.