Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Breathing Deeply

This is an asthma inhaler. You may or may not recall how I recounted in the beginning of this meme the argument necessary with the health insurance company to get coverage for this inhaler. It took many weeks before they relented and approved coverage because it was $5 more than the one they wanted us to use (we tried that one, the drug did not alleviate symptoms). Basically, I had to threaten to drag Isaac to the ER every time he so much as wheezed if they didn't get off their butts and give us the inhaler. Even with coverage it's not exactly a cheap thing but the price is somewhat less horrifying.

A month after procuring 2 of them, one for the football trainer's med kit and one for Isaac to carry around, the trainer called me to ask for a spare one since the med kit had been lost. I was less than pleased. So the med kit was eventually found. Football season ended. They have yet to return the inhaler. Call me a tightwad or whatever but these things are expensive and since they facilitate efficient oxygen/carbon dioxide exchange for my son I tend to regard them as fairly important to take good care of. Oh, did I mention he lost the first one I gave him at the beginning of the school year. Yeah, it disappeared less than a week after he came into possession of it. I told him if he lost another one he'd be working off the price of a replacement.

So last night he presented me with this. The verbal contract we entered into did not address the complete mutilation of an inhaler. For the purposes of that agreement I specified lost as meaning misplaced. After my brain registered the full scope of destruction, pondered the efficacy of superglue, and concluded the impossibility of successful reassembly (although I did actually put all the pieces back together and carefully manage to squeeze out a puff, one critical shard of plastic is completely gone), I asked the boy how exactly he managed to destroy his inhaler so thoroughly. He blinked innocently and said he had no idea. He just pulled it out of his pocket in pieces.
Today I invite, no I humbly request, your story accounting for one demolished inhaler. The struggle to obtain it had no basis in logic or reality so your explanation for its violent end need not be sensible.




20 comments:

g-man said...

Hey...Footballs a tough sport!

EmBee said...

"A vicious dog ate my homework... Oh, an my inhaler too!... Do you think we should give Michael Vic a call?"

Jazz said...

Easy. He was playing a game of touch football. It was in his pocket. Tackle. Destruction.

And it's logical too!

Michelle H. said...

I have asthma, although I can get away with using an over-the-counter shelf inhaler. I feel your pain at the expense.

An excuse: A spaceship landed in the middle of the football field and the team was abducted. I fought my way out using the inhaler although a phaser shot hit it and it dropped to the ground, shattering into pieces. But at least me and my team mates made it back to Earth alive.

Ananda girl said...

Oh dear... I'll be back with one!

Desmond Jones said...

I was hungry and mistook it for a candy bar. Man, that propellant tastes awful, y'know?

Desmond Jones said...

And I can only shake my head sympathetically at yer boy's apparent talent for destruction of items that require insurance coverage. . .

Suldog said...

Um, he's a boy?

S said...

I have never been able to crush an inhaler, but then I am not a 13 yo boy.

Noone should have to run around without something that helps them breathe, or struggle to afford something that helps them breathe!
What a bunch of hats. Horrible.

"Mom, I was riding Lakshmi home from school when my inhaler slipped out of my pocket and fell to the ground. When Lakshmi tried to pick it up for me, her huge foot crushed it. But, she was able to pick up all the pieces so I could put them back in my pocket."
"Sorry, mom"

Cricket said...

Funny, just this morning my oldest asked if he could take his inhaler to school. Absolutely not - I told him. Glad I did.

This one has the look of "I put it in my back pocket - thought I'd remember. I forgot."

Casdok said...

Oh dear! Boys will be boys!

~Dragonfly~* said...

I think he got breathing a little too heavy with the cute girl next door and ..... BAM... spontaneous combustion!!!!

I can relate to the cost of meds... 4 injections a month would cost me close to $1,500!!! (last time I checked) I don't know what I would do if I didn't have insurance.

Hilary said...

Yup.. what Suldog said.

Cocotte said...

My son's American History book is a monster. Anything caught under that book in a book bag would be demolished.

Craver Vii said...

It happened to be too close to some food which he was (ahem) inhaling. We are not sure whether it broke from perfunctory chewing or from putting it through the laundry in an effort to cleanse it from the rest of the digestive process.

(M)ary said...

Oh dear. I have an inhaler in my purse. Have had one there for 3 yrs....I have sat on my purse, dumped the contents of my purse. And stuffed iit to the gills...the inhaler survived...

heartinsanfrancisco said...

"I was hit right in the pocket by a speeding bus and the inhaler saved my life, Mom, but sadly, gave up its own in the process."

(Otherwise known as cutting a mother's complaints off at the ankles.)

Beach Bum said...

I also agree with what Suldog said.

Mona said...

maybe he sat on his jacket pocket, or maybe someone else did.

Jocelyn said...

Did you feed him falafel? If so, was he, errrr, gassy?

Did he emit The Shot Heard 'Round the World?