Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Slice of Lime-Redneck Woman

Mr. Lime, Diana, and Isaac are all hunters.  I am glad they are because having a freezer full of nice lean, organic venison is so much cheaper and healthier than buying beef all year.  Mr. Lime got a deer during archery season which takes place earlier in the Fall.  Hence, there was a little less pressure for him to get one during rifle season which starts the Monday after Thanksgiving. 

Once he got his first deer he began asking me to accompany him to the woods.  I can't hunt since I don't have a license but I am allowed to sit with him.  Of course, that necessitates dressing the part.  Orange is required for safety and many warm layers are required to prevent frostbite.  Sitting very still and quiet is not exactly conducive to warmth.  I finally gave in and went with him last weekend. 

Decked out in camo, orange, and oversized, insulated coveralls (complete with bloodstains!) with Mr. Lime and Isaac in their respective gear, I commented that I looked like one third of Larry, Darryl, and Darryl.   They assured me I looked like the dullest member of that trio.  We walked to the tree stand and Mr. Lime sent me up the ladder then joined me.  Next he told me he wanted me to hold his gun.  I did so while looking out where he said the deer path was when he snapped this with his phone.  He thought it might help convince me to get my hunting license if I saw myself looking all official.

Well, it was nice to be invited to the inner sanctum of his hunting world but I gotta say I much prefer cooking the venison in a nice warm kitchen to sitting in a cold tree stand waiting for the deer to walk within range...not to mention preferring the smell of curried venison to that of doe estrus "cologne" designed to attract the bucks.  That is truly foul.

But hey, I look the part, right?


24 comments:

Leave It To Davis said...

I can't tell you the number of times my hubby has tried to get me to tag along with him. I told him he wouldn't want me there because when the animal came into view, I would stand up and scream, "Run for you life!!" He knows I mean it, too. I would much rather shoot animals with my camera than with a gun...and I have been married to him for 40 years in January. Can you imagine it has lasted this long with such a different point of view?

Leave It To Davis said...

Oh, and I love the Larry, Darryl and the other brother Darryl comment....loved the Bob Newhart show!!!!

That corgi :) said...

You are a good wife to go and sit with him in the cold. Being outside in cold weather, no matter how bundled up, would not be fun for me. I'm with you, a warm kitchen cooking seems like the better alternative!

betty

Stephen Hayes said...

Looking the part is most of the battle. I bet you looked like a fine hunter.

Beach Bum said...

doe estrus "cologne"

I remember that smell very well. Just the memory of it turns my stomach.

Craig said...

With all that curly hair spilling out from under your hat, you look anything but dull. . .

Years ago, I was out on my bike one fine November 15 (Opening Day of firearm season in Michigan), out among the cornfields around OurTown, when suddenly I heard rifle shots ringing out all around me. As soon as I got home, I went out and bought a blaze-orange hoodie, which I've worn for all my cold-weather rides ever since. . .

I'm with you. . . I like the venison, but I like it even better when it magincally appears in my freezer. . .

Doe-estrus cologne. . . sounds positively revolting. . .

Bijoux said...

I've never understood the sitting up high part. Is it to be safe from other shooters? Because here, you could easily shoot a deer within about a two yard range. They just stand still and look at you.

haphazardlife said...

You do look the part! Like you I much prefer eating it to killing it (not that I've ever had the chance to try). And no, I don't even cook it, cooking is Boy's job. It's much better for eveyone's health that way.

Craver Vii said...

Your near-hunting exploits have exceeded mine. I wouldn't mind going, but having been born and raised in Chicago, I'm too much of a city slicker. I've only killed paper targets at the archery range.

Suldog said...

I love the label... "some men like to see their wives in lingerie..."

Uncle Skip, said...

That looks cold.

Outdoor stuff should be in t-shirts and shorts.

lime said...

bijoux, being up high allows you to get a better vantage point...see deer coming more easily and yet they don't see you as readily.

(M)ary said...

Sooooo.....Mr. Lime asked you to hold his "gun"? Up in a tree stand? I think there is a children's rhyme for this..
Mr. and Mrs. Lime sitting in a tree...h.u.n.t i.n.g

Kat said...

I love this post. I so get this post. My hubby has tried me to go hunting but I just can't picture sitting out in the cold for hours on end only to SHOOT a beautiful deer. That sounds like a nightmare (not that I am more than willing to EAT the deer, however).
The only way I could shoot a deer is with my camera.

Good for you for going along with your hunters!

Love the picture!

Other Mary said...

Rock on Daryl! I come from a hunting family too, but I'm not a good sport like you are.

Nessa said...

We do have to humor our husbands on occasion. Mine no longer hunts but he still goes fishing. He has accepted my presence with book and camera instead of fishing pole.

Great lines in this piece.

between you and me...

Flash 55 - Wanted: Dead or Alive?

coopernicus said...

where's the banjo?

Tabor said...

Regarding your comment on the dorm for those keeping weapons I am not sure that hunting was the issue. Why a separate dorm and just a central locker. Skiing is a far greater sport and I would think they would allow closets for that before guns? I honestly don't know what spearheaded the set-up but that fact that no one signed up seems to reveal it was not well-thought out.

Tabor said...

Send them here. I have lots of deer and they need to be thinned. Problem is that they have to use a bow and arrow in this neighborhood.

Logophile said...

Darling, you look marvelous no matter what you wear.
;)

You are a good sport; I'm with LITDavis and would be warning the deer. Even better, I'd be hanging out at home reading a good book!

lime said...

tabor, i didn't know anything about the dorm situation but was just offering what may have been a possibility. but the lack of any takers at all does seem to indicate that there wasn't a lot of thought. as for thinning your herd....my guys are handy with bows and arrows too ;)

Yvonne Osborne said...

Mmm, curried vension sounds good. We have some venison in our freezer now too and I'm not sure what to do with all these chuck steaks. For those without a ready access to organic beef, venison is the next best thing. BTW, you look totally official!

Secret Agent Woman said...

You have amazing hair - I bet your neck never gets cold.

Jocelyn said...

It seems very nice that he wanted you out there with him...did he only have this photo op in mind?