Sunday, February 24, 2013

Console Me

It must be heart-breaking to be paid tons of money to star in a critically and commercially successful film then spend an evening in expensive clothes and loaned jewels while being fawned over by the media only to lose the nomination for an Academy Award.  Truly, it must require years of therapy to overcome such a crushing blow.  Something must be done to ease the suffering of these bereaved celebrities.

Fortunately, a marketing firm has stepped in to provide swag bags worth nearly $48,000 to the nominees.....although it's a paltry sum compared to 2010's $90,000 bags.  I do hope the recipients will find a way to go on in spite of the cutbacks.

So what type of comfort is provided by $48,000?  The swag bags include circus classes for the recipient's children, acupuncture, membership to a luxury lounge in Heathrow Airport, and my personal favorite, vampire facelifts, which involve sucking out a person's blood and re-injecting it into his or her face.  Yes, this is consolation.  There are also condoms, Windex wipes, and $120 worth of maple syrup.  Those three items alone sound like a party in a bag, don't they?

I realize the celebrities didn't ask for these goody bags but it still strikes me as totally excessive since I'm sure these people can well afford their own circus lessons and blood-sucking beauty treatments should they desire such things.

Well, it's late and I have to get to bed before the party is over since I have to get up early to get through half of my 80 mile round trip commute for a job that pays me just a bit over minimum wage.  My consolation is having a job (after four months of unemployment) in an urban school district where I work to give kids a safe and welcoming environment where they can explore and grow.

19 comments:

Kat said...

AMEN!
Preaching to the choir! I am so tired of celebrities celebrating themselves. I'm sick of celebrities all together and how enamored Americans have become with them. Blech.
The money spent on these events could solve the water problems in third world nations. Add in major sporting events and political parties and formal events like the inauguration. It is obscene how much money we spend on frivolity.
It makes me think of the book The Hunger Games and how much we really do resemble the people from The Capital. Scary.

Leave It To Davis said...

lol...a bit bitter tonight?

Daryl said...

and maybe some day be so in love with words they write a best screenplay and get a silly bag o'swag

Stephen Hayes said...

The only swag bag I ever received was from my doctor, and it was filled with all kinds of products for my colonoscopy.

haphazardlife said...

Amen! How is it that these people deserve so much money for what they do? Seems to me that people like teachers, nurses, etc. have much more important jobs. But what do I know

Bijoux said...

Totally agreeing with what Kat said. It's shameful the money wasted on all of it. And then you have to hear about how wonderful Angelina Jolie is for adopting some kids from a foreign country. Please....I bet everyone on this blog knows at least one person who has adopted a kid from out of the country. I know at least a dozen!

Uncle Skip, said...

I know some folks who've adopted American kids.

@Stephen - your GI doc gave you a swag bag?

Hilary said...

Movie/TV stars and athletes are so ridiculously overpaid for what they do... they play.

(M)ary said...

I totally get what you are saying but also I would add some stars are doing a lot with their influence and mo.ey:
Ben Affleck: working to make the Congo a better place, partnered with a free trade chocolate company
George Clooney: his charity has a satellite pointed at the Sudan to stop the genocide
Matt Damon: check out his ' I won't go to the toilet' campaign to bring awareness of water issues around the world
Sally Field: works with Vital Voices to mentor women and girls

snowelf said...

Since I've already vented about how I feel that what our society values as a high paid job isn't in line with what I consider should be a high paid job, I will mention what they talked about on the morning show I listen to about this topic. Not only did the celebs get the crazy swag, but the little super adorable 9 year old actress from Beasts of the Southern Wild also received the same vampire suck face treatment, an e-cigarette, and tequila. Sigh. She is much too good for that kind of crap. Seriously.
I do believe that celebs do a lot of good with their paychecks, but I believe teachers and military folks, and nurses and us every day peeps would do just as much good if we were raking in that kind of dough.

That is all.
--snow

Secret Agent Woman said...

I actually can't stomach the awards shows because it's such a display of excess and self-congratulation. Hearing what they receive as consolation prizes is sickening.

coopernicus said...

ummm...was that sarcasm?

Dave said...

I love your humour Michelle! Specially about the condoms, wipes and maple syrup. I really enjoy reading your blogs. Keep up the good work! - Dave

Dave said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Craver Vii said...

Echoing Kat's comments, I agree with you. That kind of opulence strikes me as obscene. It is vulgar to get such over-the-top compensation. Vampire injections? C'mon!

Suldog said...

MY WIFE loves to watch awards shows. She really is into the artistic part of the equation (the plays, the movies, the performances, etc.) so it's a legit love. On the other hand, I can never watch more than 15 to 20 minutes without gagging (although I have to admit I was fascinated watching Seth McFarlane and wondering just how far he'd go in skewering them. Not quite far enough to keep me watching, unfortunately, but he came close.))

truthspew said...

Back in the early part of my I.T. career we used to get flown out on junkets and given all sorts of neat tech.

Then a couple years later they realized how much money they were spending on these junkets and stopped giving away the candy store.

But they do hold a lot of them in cool locations.

And I fully intend to hit Defcon this year.

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