Da Count -Big Orange Splots

One of my favorite children's books, which I always enjoyed reading with my kids, was The Big Orange Splot by Daniel Manus Pinkwater. If you are not familiar with it, get thee to a library and check it out. It is wonderful. It;s about Mr. Plumbean, who lives on a neat street where all the houses are the same. One day a seagull flies over his house and spills a can of orange paint on Mr. Plumbean's roof. The neighbors are in an uproar because the neighborhood is no longer neat. they implore Mr. Plumbean to do something about this problem assuming he will conform to the old pattern. Instead he preserves the big orange splot and paints the rest of his house in wild colors and patterns. He also includes elephants, pretty girls, and steam shovels. When the neighbors express their outrage his defense is, "My house is me, and I am it. It looks like all of my dreams." One by one, Plumbean's neighbors begin to convert their houses into their own dreams as respect for creativity and individuality spreads. They discard the notion of a neat street and find community in the idea that, "Our street is us and we are it. It looks like all of our dreams."

Yesterday's craft project was to make a log cabin bank out of a Chinese take out box. One helper covered them all in brown paper for me. Another helper made a sample. We put out the boxes, a bunch of construction paper and markers, and some glue and scissors. I told the kids they could make their bank houses any way they wanted. I absolutely loved watching the different ideas they all had.


One fellow's dreams didn't consist so much of a house as a fortress. (And check out the hairstyle he sported for crazy hair day and mismatch day. Rock on!)

For some people, their dreams included trees, shutters, and pets they could indulge.

For some, the dreams include sliding boards that start at the roof. I hope he invites me to visit someday.

Just being allowed to work on your own dreams is a cause to smile.

And then there are a these girls who have dreams of books so they didn't make houses at all. One made a library, the other made her own Border's Store. They are girls after my own heart. Oh, and the newest Borders franchise owner has much more fun making funny faces when she is asked to smile and show what makes her happy about her house. Rock on, girlfriends!
When I planned this craft I have to admit, I only had vague notions of 50 little log cabins. Mind you I never require conformity in my craft projects. I just didn't imagine so many kids would go so far from the cabin idea and add so many other embellishments. When I began to see the fabulous divergence I got as excited as the kids. I just had to fan that flame. It reminded me of Pinkwater's book, which I had not thought of in a long time. It was a very good and timely reminder. So this week I am counting such a sublime chance to peek in the windows of many dream houses.

Now tell me how a house that is you and you are it would look if it looked like all of your dreams.

Why Rush into Things?

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. ~Mark Twain

Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. ~Spanish Proverb

I do my work at the same time each day - the last minute. ~Author Unknown

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. ~Gerald Vaughan

You may delay, but time will not. ~Benjamin Franklin

Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment. ~Robert Benchley

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. ~Don Marquis

Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday. ~Author Unknown

Procrastination is like Masturbation. At first it feels good but in the end you're just screwing yourself. ~Author Unknown

It's that time of year again. It's time for me to come up with crafts ideas to fill up a week of activities for the 5-8 year olds during Vacation bible School. In spite of my subversive suggestion of having kids make penis gourds, in spite of using dead fish as an artistic medium, and in spite of the great wind spinner disaster of 2008 the organizers of the week keep asking me back. I think they know a cheap deal when they see it. For crying out loud I get a budget of roughly $200 to come up with crafts for 50 kids five days in a row. It's artistic fishes and loaves the way I multiply that little bit to cover the multitudes.

This year I was waaaaay behind the 8 ball. The insanity starts today. I began planning on Thursday. I bought supplies on Friday and Saturday. Sunday night at 7:00 pm I started constructing samples. And what am I doing after midnight instead of getting to bed ASAP to be well rested? I'm sitting here to type up this blog post. Well, I wouldn't want to let that slide now, would I?

Note to Self...

Even if you pre-assemble this craft so all the kids have to do is string the beads in...

Even if you gather together 6 extra volunteers to help the kids do the stringing...

Even if the schedule gives you 10 minutes more for arts & crafts time than you had before...

This craft should not be attempted with 29 five and six year olds because when you plot them out on a bell curve for manual dexterity, attention span, and frustration threshold you will have about 5 who can do this and 6 who declare they cannot before standing up from the table and leaving. The remainder will try but not have much fun and wind up all yanking your arms, legs, and tee shirt or poking you in the ribs or beating you on the back as they whine, "Mrs. Lime, 1)my string is tangled, 2)Jimmy's beads are all on the floor, 3)my plastic needle came off the string, 4)I want more pink beads instead of green beads 5)I don't like this and I want to go home." As you are calmly trying to sort out the various difficulties one of your adult helpers will become as demanding as the 5 year olds and you will snarl at her to PLEASE give you a moment to deal with the little people grabbing at you because for crying out loud she has had over 5 decades to learn how to take turns and wait patiently. When the 5 & 6 year olds trudge off with tangled messes 10 minutes late to their next activity you will be filled with mortal dread at having to repeat this particular brand of hell with 22 seven and eight year olds a few minutes.

You will come to realize in roughly a decade of doing arts & crafts for VBS week that this was your single worst idea for a project ever. You will remember fondly the trepidation you felt prior to letting the kids paint with dead fish or mess with 5 gallon buckets of tie dye chemicals. You will announce your need for a good stiff drink within earshot of the most temperate and sweetly pure pastor's wife. You will engage in self flagellation because you don't like any kids to go away from arts & crafts feeling frustrated.

However, at the end of the day one of last year's 8 year olds who has moved up to the older group this year will come find you sitting at your table feeling like today was a complete failure. She will say how coming to your arts & crafts time was her favorite part of VBS and she wishes she was still in the lower grade so she could come this year. Her eyes will sparkle as she speaks animatedly of tie dyeing and painting with dead fish. She will give you a hug and say you are the best craft lady ever. You will be very thankful for such a fond remembrance shared with you at that moment.

You will give her the sample you made of today's project...

Partly to say thanks for her kind words...

Partly to see the smile it puts on her face...

Partly because if you ever lay eyes on another one of these cursed projects it may kick in the symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.